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“I need to give you a name,” Tae-il said conversationally as I stretched out on his lap.
My heart was soothed by his kind voice. I was grateful for Tae-il’s gentle nature, especially after being terrorized at the hands of that demon vet.
Although Tae-il was a man, his skin was smooth and his mouth was always smiling. His slightly curly light brown hair, whether dyed or not, framed his handsome face perfectly. Overall, he had a very soft, welcoming appearance, and whenever he spoke sweetly to me, I felt like I was a person again.
“How can you be so pretty?”
He always touched me with a careful hand, and he was so sensitive to my mood that my throat purred in joy. His touch was the exact opposite of a certain someone else—the vet to be exact, who only saw me as a guinea pig or an alien to experiment on.
Simply thinking about him caused my fur to stand on end. I licked my paws and squeezed my eyes, and then rubbed my face until the fur was flattened again.
I couldn’t believe I ended up in such a warm, comfortable home like this. Memories of the rainy roof made me shiver.
“Mya.” (I owe him a favor.)
I had been alone on that roof for a while, so I decided to become a pet cat at Tae-il’s home for the time being, at least until I could walk and talk in human mode.
“Hmm? What are you saying?” Tae-il said as he stroked my ears.
He liked cats, and maybe all animals, and was kind to other humans. Once he showed a small amount of goodwill towards me, I knew I could trust in him. His home was perfectly pleasant and secure, and although his generosity was directed solely to the cat version of me, there wasn’t anything else more reliable. It was also a bonus that his place was close to my meeting place with the angel of death.
Until a few days ago, I hadn’t even wanted to live with a man who was essentially a stranger. Now I knew there was no place better I could have ended up. Even more so when that damned vet decided to help me out.
As I stewed in my thoughts, Tae-il’s hand came underneath my chin and gently started to scratch me. He looked happy that he had another companion in his home, not to mention one as beautiful and intelligent as me.
And so, the two of us started living together, as a pet cat with its owner.
Unfortunately for me, however, I would soon experience misfortune with that devilish vet.
***
It was more difficult to imitate a cat than I thought. Damn it.
“She doesn’t poop.”
Tae-il lifted me onto the examination table. We were back at the veterinary clinic again, and I could tell Si-yul was biting back his laughter.
“Pffffft…”
Constipation was a common complaint for animal patients, but Si-yul was surprised to see that it had afflicted such an intelligent creature like me.
I climbed back up on Tae-il’s shoulder keep as much distance from Si-yul as possible. I didn’t expect to see the demon’s again in just three days. If I had known this, I would have eaten my food and pooped! I needed to think out a cat’s life in more detail than I thought, or else my human dignity would be unintentionally threatened.
“What do you use for cat litter?”
“I’ve used three different brands, but she doesn’t even look at them.”
I used my claws to balance myself on Tae-il’s shoulders, and kept a wary eye on the vet.
“Does she eat?” Si-yul asked as he watched me back.
“Yes, I leave her food before I go to work, and when I come back it’s all gone.”
“But there’s no sign of bowel movement? For three days?”
“That’s why I’m worried.”
“It’s certainly strange. If she’s eaten…”
No bowel movement? Si-yul’s eyes gleamed with interest, and a chill shivered through me when I saw the dangerous light in his eyes.
“I live in an apartment so there’s nowhere else for her to do her business. And I don’t think she knows how to use the toilet and flush it…” Tae-il trailed off worriedly, and Si-yul looked like he was doing everything in his power not to burst out laughing. He was probably imagining me using the toilet. I was actually flushing down the food, but Tae-il’s guess was closer than I expected.
Si-yul pressed down his smile and continued in a reliable veterinarian’s voice, his eyes remained fixed on me all the while.
“Perhaps it’s constipation. We can take an X-ray to see how much has accumulated in her intestines.”
“Mya?” (Constipation?)
“Oh, is it?” Tae-il said. “Thank goodness. It’s better if it was just constipation than a serious illness.”
I couldn’t believe that my beautiful owner wished for something as terrible as constipation on me. Tae-il tried to pull me off his shoulder to place me back on the table, but I dug my claws into his shirt.
“Mya!” (No!)
“Huh?”
Tae-il was surprised that his sweet little cat had suddenly turned feral. As Si-yul watched the exchange, he waved his hands and gave that enigmatic smile.
“I’m kidding. It would be ridiculous to spend that much money on X-rays.”
“Then?” Tae-il queried.
“There are some outdoor cats who won’t go unless it’s on real dirt.”
“Then I have to dig some dirt?”
“You can bring her to a nearby park or somewhere spacious once a day.”
Tae-il was unsure about Si-yul’s prescription. Tae-il’s knowledge of cats was very limited, but releasing a cat into an open area sounded dangerous. Not to mention, a poop walk was for a dog, not a cat.
“What if she runs away?” Tae-il said worriedly.
“It’s definitely not recommended for all cats, but this one’s very smart,” Si-yul reassured him. “I think she’ll be fine.”
Tae-il nodded in agreement. “… Yes, this child really is smart. Whenever I hold out my hand she puts her paw in it, and when I tell her to sit, she sits.”
“Oh, really?” Si-yul said with interest.
Tae-il liked to jokingly hold out his hand like he was playing with a dog, and I would place my paw in it. His worries were soon alleviated, and he nodded his head.
“Come to think of it, I can release her at the roof garden of my apartment building. It’s also the place where I first found her.”
“Good, as long as there isn’t any danger there. She just might be nervous because your home is still unfamiliar to you. And this way is cheaper, isn’t it?”
“Yeah…”
“So, first you can release her on the roof, and if she still doesn’t have any bowel movement in the next day or two, you can bring her back to me.”
Tae-il listened attentively and nodded hard. He was the naive type who thought doctors and teachers were absolutely right all the time.
Soon after, Si-yul smiled and suggested an examination of me just in case. Tae-il handed me over to the devil’s hands without any hesitation.
“Myamya!” (Don’t let me go!)
My struggle was futile as I found myself entrapped in the hands of Si-yul once more. I cried out again as Tae-il walked out of the room, but it was no use. The door shut with a resounding click.
As soon as we were alone, Si-yul immediately turned inquisitive. “So, are you using the toilet? Or do you not have bowel movement?”
“…”
He had a face I couldn’t stand. I wish I could scratch him!
While I succeeded in flushing down the food, I failed to pretend I heard the call of nature. How could I poop if I didn’t eat! This cat-shaped body was actually a relic from the afterlife, and while I had a faint sense of hunger, eating was not essential. This vessel was also resistant against cold and heat.
I wasn’t about to go into detail about this body’s special functions, however, and I turned my head away.
“No bowel movement!” I huffed. As much I hated to admit it, I had a symbiotic relationship with this man, and I felt forced to reciprocate.
“That’s incredible. Can you live without eating?”
“…Maybe. It’s strange. What the hell do you want?”
Si-yul looked to be bursting with questions, but I had no desire to stimulate that curiosity any further. He already knew that I was quite a grumpy and highly strung cat, and evidence of that was still clear by the scratches on his hand. He wouldn’t give up, however.
“I already helped you once, didn’t I?”
“What?! What did you do to help me?”
“I didn’t diagnose you for constipation.”
“Myamyamya! Thank you very much!” I snorted and turned my nose away.
He touched my tiny ears, but he didn’t ask any more questions, and so I didn’t bite him. It was clear that the vet made it easier for me to pretend to be a cat. I was fearful to make him my enemy, so I reluctantly decided to keep him as an ally.
I’ll have to go up to the rooftop every morning to do things no one else would see, but at least the imitation became more believable.