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Su Bai – this was a name everyone in Great Yue was familiar with.
Not because Su Bai was extraordinarily gifted or talented, but because she was the only living descendant of the legendary Su family.
Ten years ago, when the city of Luoyang was conquered, the Su family which had enjoyed a hundred years of prestige and fame collapsed overnight. The males were killed, buried beyond the walls of Luoyang, while the females hung themselves within the Su family manor.
The only survivor of this bloodshed was the young daughter, Su Bai, who vanished without a trace. For over ten years, the devoted subordinates of the Su family searched high and low for this young girl. Even now, the walls of Luoyang continue to be plastered with her posters. With the entire affair causing a storm throughout the city, today, no one within Great Yue was unfamiliar with the name Su Bai.
Ten years later, in an indifferent voice, this woman who suddenly appeared before me told me her name was Su Bai.
As an ordinary, unremarkable little civilian, the instant I heard her name, I was stunned and choked on my sweet potato…
She looked at the shock written all over my face and laughed soundlessly, before she continued, ‘Back then, I went to Southern Zhao, so I never knew that they were looking for me. Later, when I finally knew, it was too late for me to return.’
She could no longer return.
Because in Southern Zhao, she fell in love with a man.
That man was the person who rescued her twelve-year old self from the ruins of the fallen city of Luoyang, before bringing her to Southern Zhao. He was the Gu Master of Southern Zhao, a man whose existence was as revered upon as a deity’s – Yue Chi.
Perhaps anyone who heard his name would imagine that such a name could only belong to an exceedingly callous, selfish and demonic man.
But to Su Bai, he was not such a person.
He taught her the art of mastering the gu, a poison carried by venomous insects.
He taught her how to be strong.
When she was ill, he brewed medicine for her.
When she cried, he wiped away her tears.
Once, he had said to the twelve-year old Su Bai, ‘Su Bai, I will give you a home.’
And so Su Bai believed with all her heart that he would give her a home. And then she followed him with devotion, and in the days that passed, as the weeks melded into months and the months turned into years, she fell in love with him.
‘I have always looked up to him.’ Su Bai stared unseeingly at the bonfire as she continued, ‘Everyday, without fail, I studied all there was to know about the different venomous insects, and memorised all the techniques in preparing a gu poison. When others retired for the night, I continued to read my books by the lamplight; when others woke up the next morning, I had long climbed the mountains in search of the venomous insects.’
She even asked the others about the likes and dislikes of Yue Chi, carefully observing his habits.
She knew that he disliked it when others prevaricated and said ‘because… that’s why I…’, so she never explained nor excused herself each time she made a mistake.
She knew that he did not like excessive noise, so she never wore any jewelry nor adorned herself with ornaments.
She knew that he did not like dust and dirt in his room, so each time before she visited him, she would first bathe and change her clothes, before stepping barefoot into his palace.
Ten years of conscientiousness and carefulness.
In the end, he said to her, ‘Su Bai, you are distracted by unnecessary thoughts. Someone who has such thoughts will never be able to become a good Gu Master.’
‘Later, he accepted another disciple. Her name was Ah Lai. She was the Princess of Southern Zhao, and was gifted with a fine voice. Do you know, every time she sang, Master would smile. His smile was so warm, but he had never smiled towards me. I tried so hard, risking my life time after time to create the perfect gu poison to make him happy, yet she did not have to do anything, other than sing some songs and gather some flowers, and she could already make him laugh.’
As Su Bai recalled the past, her eyes began to water. I remained silent without a word, and could only pretend to be unperturbed by continuing to weave my red thread of destiny.
Su Bai raised a sleeve to wipe away her tears, looking like a young child who had suffered a grievance, before she continued, ‘Later, Master told me he no longer had any use for me. He wanted me to continue my own training to become a good Gu Master.’
That night, it had been snowing. The moon hung high in the skies, its glow incandescent in the endless sea of darkness. She had knelt in front of his room, crying as she pleaded with him. Yet that man remained coolly distant, as if she were a mere ghost.
She cried until her voice became hoarse, until, at last, it was Ah Lai who came and helped her up from the ground.
Ah Lai said to her, ‘Su Bai, do you know, a person only exists because he is of use. As long as you are useful to Southern Zhao, Master will never abandon you.’
A pause. Then Ah Lai continued, ‘Su Bai, join the war and become someone of use. Southern Zhao will become your country. We will be your home.’
‘And then you came?’ I was surprised.
Su Bai did not answer. After a long moment, she nodded, lifting her head to stare at the stars which twinkled in the night skies. ‘Sometimes, a person’s stubbornness will become a vice. Each time a battle ended, I would be tormented by the nightmares. But each time I brought the latest military reports to his palace and saw him, I would feel that it was all worth it. But I never knew exactly how long I could persevere.’
She raised a hand to her heart, and slowly said, ‘I did not even dare to use my name. Whenever I saw the word ‘Su’, it was as though I was heading on the path towards destruction, slipping beyond the reach of redemption. Each time I saw him smile towards Ah Lai, the despair in my heart drove me to insanity.’
‘Then, what dream do you wish for?’ I raised the red thread woven between my fingers. ‘I have already used the memories you’ve described to me to weave a dream for you. After you die, I will draw you into this illusion. What do you wish to do within this dream?’
‘I wish to see him.’ She smiled faintly and covered her eyes with her hands. Finally, I saw the large drops of tears sliding down the curve of her face. ‘And then, be with him forever.’
***
That was her dream.
I promised her, and when dawn broke the next morning, she had already left together with my last sweet potato. Following that, I returned to the military camps of Great Yue in dejection, kneeling before my master’s rooms as I cried while admitting to my mistakes.
My master did not harden his heart to expel me. After his anger subsided, he once again brought me to the battlefield, where he continued to impart his teachings towards me.
Back then, the main armies of Great Yue and Southern Zhao were fighting at close range, making it difficult to distinguish between the two forces. I stood at the top of the city tower, and saw with astonishment a great white python amongst the vanguard of the enemy’s troops.
Standing atop the head of the python was a young woman dressed in black robes, her hair flying in the wind. With a jerk of her slender wrists, countless gu insects scurried forth from her sleeves as they scattered in the direction of the troops of Great Yue.
I did not have a clear look at the woman. Only, I saw the soldiers swarm towards her like a great wave of angry seas. Yet the army of Southern Zhao which stood behind her did not move an inch, watching coldly as the crowd of soldiers from Great Yue slowly smothered her.
Following that, I saw the young General who stood next to me abruptly draw back his bow as he bellowed, ‘Su Bai!’
That young woman raised her head, and it was in that split-second of hesitation when a rain of arrows pierced through the bloody skies to penetrate her shoulders.
The young General laughed, his voice jarring. I turned to look at him, only to see that he had laughed until tears had fallen from his eyes. He stood at the top of the city tower, his voice demanding as he said, ‘Su Bai, how can you face your entire family of fallen soldiers, a family with a hundred years of loyalty to Great Yue?!’
‘Su Bai, do you know – beyond the city of Luoyang where the bones of your father and brothers were buried, the flowers which have blossomed has already reached our waist level!’
Even as he said these words, countless gu insects were already swarming towards him. Eventually, that young General could not endure against the excruciating pain. With a leap, he jumped off the top of the city tower.
My master hurriedly pulled me towards the back, protecting me from the chaos. From my narrow cracks of vision, I saw Su Bai expertly navigate her python as she anxiously made her way towards the base of the city tower, before she carried the body of the young General into her arms.
I did not know what the young General said to her. I only saw Su Bai use her sleeves to wipe away the fresh blood which spilled from his mouth over and over again, her sorrowful cries piercing through the bloody battlefield.
I had never seen a person cry in such devastation before. Even till today, I am unable to forget this image of her grief. My master quickly observed that I was in a state of shock, and hurriedly dragged me away from the city tower.
It was in that war-torn battlefield that she hugged that man, crying her heart out.
Much later, from the whispers which spread, I learned that though she had been gravely wounded, she nonetheless managed to slaughter her way out of the encirclement together with her python.
At that time, the soldiers who intercepted her did not only include the troops of Great Yue, for the soldiers of Southern Zhao had also turned their bows towards her as they released arrow after unrelenting arrow in her direction.
In the end, with a body covered with injuries, she disappeared without a trace, shaking off her pursuers.
One year later, I finally finished my tutelage and became a Master of Destiny, where I started to fulfil my responsibilities according to my pact with my Master.
I was surrounded by a sea of people, coming forth to me with endless requests.
Yet I never managed to find her.
So, even though I continued accepting the businesses from others, I started travelling south, until three years later, I finally arrived at Southern Zhao, the way I had promised that person.
Indeed, my trip had not been in vain. I had only arrived for three days when I met Yue Chi.