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There is a bad feeling about this.
Anyway, could it be that there was any movement in the Acacia kingdom … or something unwelcomed happened on the front line with the Twil’s country?
"What happened?"
"We won the war with Twil’s country."
"Well … that’s really good! Why your face…"
The good news is not reflected on her face.
Rather it is safe to say that something disastrous happened.
"Yes, but Dean is … Dean is …"
She is scared to say it.
I mean, she must be upset that she him called Dean rather than Prince Alfred.
"… We also received news that Dean was killed"
In a moment, my world turned black.
…
"…?"
I don’t understand her words.
Dead… What did it mean that he dies?
My mind refuses to understand …
But her words echo over and over again in my head.
"… Tanya. what happened to Dean?"
At my question, Tanya’s face gets distorted for a moment … but she immediately removes her expression and opens her mouth.
"It's said that he was killed by a falling arrow."
"It's …… confirmed?"
The noise on my heart don’t let me hear well.
t's scary to hear her answer.
"… Yes. All the subordinates from each direction had similar reports."
And to that answer, my heart was torn apart.
"… What a joke? Because of him we won? I never wanted him to go to the frontlines! So, what if the kingdom of Tasmeria has won …! Why did this happen? Why??! “
With a sense of emptiness and extreme pain, I scream.
" …Why… "
The passion did not last long, though.
I wanted Tanya to tell me it was a lie.
I wanted to deny it as false information.
But when I look at her expression, I can tell.
Because, I have never seen this girl make a face like this.
My mouth shakes uncontrollably, and big drop of tears fall from my eyes.
…… What she told me, above all, I know that it’s an unmistakable fact.
A sense of loss and emptiness overcomes me.
With those emotions taking control of me, I lost all strength and was about to fall to the floor.
I quickly cling to my desk, in an attempt to recover.
At the same time, the documents that were on the desk went flying everywhere.
"… Lady …"
Tanya was approaching me, who was out of myself, step by step.
…… Stop, don't get close.
Don't make me remember it again and again with your face.
My heart screams and my body tries to move backwards.
But as she touched me, I couldn't move.
"… I'm sorry. Let me be alone."
I squeezed the words out my mouth.
Tanya and Merida’s faces got distorted at my reply.
Oh … don't make that look. I would like to say …… I'm fine…
But I couldn’t say it at the end.
I stand up silently and walk out of the room.
Was this… our end?
I regret it so much… I was distracted trying to know if the way I headed was the right path or not.
Everything fades, and even though it’s visible to the eyes, we don’t take it as true, until it happens.
I don’t know what will become of me, I feel like… now all don’t matter anymore.
I walk supporting myself on the walls and get back to my bedroom somehow.
As soon as I opened the door, my strength went away, and I fell to the carpet.
"Dean …"
Big drop of tears left my eyes.
How long have I been crying like that?
I was stunned after seeing myself on the mirror but continued sitting on the spot.
When I noticed, the sunset was visible from the window.
…… I intended to rest a little as I laid in the bed.
Oh, but if I don't get back to work … such an idea pops up in my head.
However, my body can’t move at all, as if sewed on the spot.
I pulled out strength from no one knows where and sat again.
Speaking of which, every time I fell down exhausted or sick… the first thing I was worried about was work.
However, thanks to Dean's help, I always managed to manage somehow. More and more memories about him come to my head.
"Hey, help me. Dean … Like all those times …"
Now, that I can’t get up from your loss, help me Dean… to continue without you…
I still have a pale expectation that he might appear suddenly, but … I know I’m only dreaming.
Even if this is just another moment when I fell, Dean will not come this time around.
…… Tanya said it.
Dean is dead.
He was killed by the falling arrows.
He died … he is no longer in this world.
Wherever I look, it’s a world without Dean.
I’ll never see him again nor talk to him anymore.
Thinking so far, I exhale to calm down my heart.
"Oh yeah …"
Tears overflowed again.
No, no, no …!
I can’t believe that he is gone. I don’t want to believe.
We won the war.
We won the struggle with Edward, as well as the war with the Twil’s country. But why …!
I pull my hair with all my strength and cry in silence.
I can’t hear his voice anymore.
I can’t see his smile anymore.
…… There is no one else for me out there anymore!
The world turned dark.
Sad, lonely, painful …
Those feelings one after another afflict me.
My chest is painful. No matter how much it hurts, that feeling has taken root in my
heart and I can't help it.
The pocket watch on my chest shakes.
I took it out from under my clothes.
I still remember when he handed me this pocket watch.
Gentle and beautiful memories.
"Why … why …!"
A tremendous sense of despair accompanied by suffering as if I had lost my body overcomes me.
I squeezed it with force.
It’s painful, I don't want to admit it, and I reached out for the watch as if that could bring me back Dean.
But of course, Dean will never come back.
His image just floated in the air.
Bitterness is further raised.
I kept crying out emotionally.
Some time passed as I continued crying… I lost all strength once again and fell down.
I get up and tears overflow from my eyes again.
It's not a dream.
When will I be able to overcome this deep grief?
When will I be able to stand up again?
"Dean … are you here …?"
I hate this world that made me lose the thing that was more important to me than myself, it would have been good if I never came here in the first place.
A black emotion erodes my heart and tears spill over again.
When I raised my face, it was getting dark outside.
…… as if it were a reflection of my heart.
A cloudy sky where no stars could be seen.
…… I hope another morning will not come.
It is good if a tomorrow doesn’t exist.
… because he is not there.
If he is not there, I can't stand it.
With this sense of loss, I will have to keep going.
I kept crying and fell again.