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Xiangrong thought, just for this sentence, even if she died now, she would be happy, right? One sentence “I am willing”, she will remember this for the rest of her life. And all her life, she will feel moved because of this sentence. This would become her belief for living in this world, just like a curse, her heart was completely enveloped.
Xuan Tianhua would never lie, when he said he was willing, then he was truly willing. Even though his heart clearly knew that the person taking up the largest area in his heart was not this girl Feng Xiangrong, he was unable to ask for the person anyway. He had thought of being alone his whole life, but he was unwilling to disappoint Imperial Concubine Yun, unwilling to feel awkward when facing Feng Yueng and Xuan Tianming again many years later. Therefore, choosing one person to spend his remaining days together was the best result.
And the person who he would spend the rest of his days with, from what he could see now, other than Feng Xiangrong, he truly could not remember other women. It seemed like other than Xuan Tiange and Feng Yuheng, all the women were just passing clouds and smoke in his eyes. He had spoken with some of them before, but he would forget them later. He had interacted with some of them before but they were unable to leave behind any traces in his heart at all. He vaguely remembered about the Princess from Zong Sui some years back, and thinking about it now, he could remember that person was known as Yu Qianyin, but what she looked like, what her real name was, he could not remember at all.
But for Feng Xiangrong, a young girl like her, every time they met he would always know that she was the third daughter of the Feng family, her small build resembled Feng Yuheng a lot, but her timid personality was completely opposite from Feng Yuheng. At the beginning, Feng Yuheng asked him to look out for her, and after that, it became a habit for him, every time he met Xiangrong, he would treat her a little differently from the rest. He had thought that it was because of Feng Yuheng, but now that he thought about it, it might not be completely so, this young girl had left some impression and traces in his heart which was untouched by mortal matters.
Choosing someone to spend the rest of his days with, if he had to choose, then he would choose someone he could remember. Feng Xiangrong, fulfilled this criteria.
Xuan Tianhua smiled calmly, clearing the doubts in his heart.
In the capital’s crystal side courtyard, Feng Fendai laid on a rocking chair. With that chair rocking back and forth, she squinted, watching Xiao Bao play with the maid in front of her, occasionally showing a relieved smile. But this smile also disappeared quickly. More frequently, she looked dazed instead, with a sense of feeling lost about not knowing what laid ahead.
On the other end of the winding corridor of this courtyard, the Fifth Prince Xuan Tianyan was standing at that place and looking in this direction, his gaze landing on Fendai in front of him. Seeing her wear the white crystal earrings, he felt that he was in a stupor.
The maid Dong Ying was currently standing next to the Fifth Prince, seeing where the Fifth Prince was looking at, she felt some worry.
“How are the spirits of your Young Miss recently? Finally, the Fifth Prince asked, looking away from Fendai, looking at Xiao Bao instead. That child was fairer and had developed more compared to when he was younger and became more good looking. When his side profile was seen sometimes, there was some shadow of Feng Jinyuan in the past.
Dong Ying answered quickly, she said: “Replying Your Highness the Fifth Prince, Young Miss has not been in a good state in the past one month. These few days, she looked even more lonely compared to the last few times Your Highness came to visit. She would frequently sit in the courtyard just like this for an entire day, either watching Xiao Bao play or chat idly with the servants, but she would mostly talk about what happened in Feng Manor in the past, sometimes feeling said, sometimes getting angry.”
“Is that so!” Xuan Tianyan looked bitter, “How about her treatment of the child? Does she take care of him well like before?”
“Yes.” Dong Ying spoke honestly, “Young Miss still treats Xiao Bao well. Even though she would raise her hand and hit him a few times when he cries and throws too much of a temper, she would feel pained after hitting, then hug Xiao Bao and cry. Xiao Bao is also more aware now and is very close to Young Miss. When Young Miss cries, he would be beside her wiping her tears, it was painful to watch.”
“That is good.” Xuan Tianyan said: “At least she still harbours feelings to that child and will not become a completely heartless person.”
“Your Highness.” Dong Ying was a little anxious, “This Servant knows that Young Miss’ behaviour has disappointed you, and knows that our Young Miss’ temper is not good. But she does think of Your Highness! Everything she did is for the sake of Your Highness, hoping that she can have a better future with Your Highness. So Your Highness, please do not abandon our Young Miss!”
Xuan Tianyan listened to this, and looked towards Fendai again, showing a troubled smile and saying: “When was she doing this for my sake, she was only doing it for herself. If she was really doing it for my sake, then she should understand that everything she did was not what I wanted. Forget it, keep her company properly, This Prince is leaving.” Saying this, he did not stay any longer, turning around and leaving.
Dong Ying wanted to stop him but Xiao Bao fell down at this time, crying loudly. Dong Ying quickly ran back, worried that Xiao Bao would cry and irritate Fendai. In reality, Fendai did not treat Xiao Bao well, to the point that when Xiao Bao cried and made a fuss, he would be hit by Fendai. That child’s back had blue and purple bruises, those were traces of being pinched by Fendai. But she did not dare to say such things to the Fifth Prince, she could tell that the Fifth Prince was already very disappointed in her Young Miss. In the eyes of the Fifth Prince, Xiao Bao was the only person who Fendai still had feelings for. If she also told him about Xiao Bao, he would only think Fendai was heartless. And the price of this heartlessness, Dong Ying did not dare to think about it, fearing that it would be the worst case scenario.
She carried Xiao Bao further away, placating him continuously. On the other side, Fendai’s brow was already knitted, she told a granny coldly: “Hit him! Hit until he doesn’t cry.”
That granny was not kind, receiving the order and was going to hit him, but Dong Ying protected that child fiercely, saying loudly at the same time: “Young Miss, you cannot hit him! Which child would not cry after hitting, he would definitely cry harder! If Young Miss does not like it, This Servant will ask for someone to carry Xiao Bao away, carrying him far away. When he stops crying, he can be carried back to play with Young Miss.”
Feng Fendai scoffed coldly and did not insist, only saying: Then quickly carry him further away, don’t let me hear that annoying crying.”
Dong Ying quickly handed the child to a servant and instructed them to carry him to the furthest courtyard. She returned to Fendai’s side, kneeling down and advising with all her might: “Young Miss, we cannot continue on like this, if you feel unhappy, This Servant will accompany you on a walk. Shall we live at a temple outside the city for a few days to quieten our hearts, would that be good?”
Fendai asked in confusion: “Why do we have to live at a temple? Do you know what kind of place a temple is? In Feng family in the past, Chen Shi was sent to a temple because she made a mistake. That is a place to lock sinners up, why do I have to go there for no reason?”
“This Servant does not have such intentions.” Dong Ying felt wronged, “This Servant only wants Young Miss to clear your heart. Recently, the fire in your heart is a little strong and your mood is not good. If this goes on, you will fall ill. And Young Master, he has been hit by you until there are not many intact areas on his body, you cannot hit him anymore. Young Master is a good child. With you hitting and pinching him like this, he is still willing to be close to you, so based on the fact that this child is devoted to being close to Young Miss, please don’t hit him anymore!”
“But I just want to hit him.” Fendai straightened up, saying every word to Dong Ying clearly: “I just want to hit him, sometimes I hate that I cannot beat him to death!”
“But…… why?” Dong Ying did not understand, “Didn’t Young Miss treat Young Master very well in the past? You used to love him so much and said that you don’t have many family members left in this world. This child is a close family member and keeps you company in the palace, that is good!”
“How is that good?” Feng Fendai asked Dong Ying in a crazed manner: “Did you not realise, as the child grows older, he is staring to bear more resemblance to…… Feng Jinyuan!”
Dong Ying jolted and got goosebumps in an instant. Xiao Bao resembled Feng Jinyuan? It seemed like that was a little resemblance, and some days ago, she heard some servants commenting amongst themselves that the child had become fairer and was more good looking compared to when he was younger. And she had seen that child’s side profile a few times, and there was a shadow of Prime Minister Feng in the old days. But…… but that child clearly was not Feng Jinyuan! Everyone knew that that was a child Han Shi had with a troupe actor and Feng Jinyuan completely lost his reputation because of this and was the joke of everyone in the capital. But why is it like this now……
“Don’t you feel that it’s strange as well?” Feng Fendai told Dong Ying: “The older he gets, the more he resembles Feng Jinyuan, this does not match the facts from before, right? Heheh!” She shrugged and could not help but laugh, “I also feel that it’s strange, when Father left at that time, my birth mother could not get pregnant as planned and there was no signs after more than one month, she only had illicit intercourse because she had no other options. But anything is possible, every time I see Xiao Bao recently, I start to think, maybe my mother judged it wrongly, and the physician she asked to come was unreliable. She was pregnant but it was not discovered. In addition, that child does look dark after getting born, so everyone misunderstood. But look at him now, he had already changed like this at this age. After a few years, even idiots can tell that he is different from when he was a toddler. Looking at him, between him and Feng Zirui, he resembles Feng Jinyuan more!”
Dong Ying felt flustered hearing this, only thinking that if it was really like this, then at that time, Concubine Han would have died with just injustice? That child Xiao Bao also suffered so much, how much injustice was that?
She looked at Fendai and only spoke after half a beat: “If it was really like that, Young Miss should be happy. Xiao Bao is blood related to the Feng family. People are not blind and will see this sooner or later. At that time, you can restore Concubine Han’s name, and restore Xiao Bao’s name, letting him become a true child of the Feng family, so that he will be able to hold his head up high after growing up.”
“What is good about that?” Fendai gritted her teeth and said harshly: “The Feng family is no more, the Feng Manor is no more, what is good about having the identity as a child of the Feng family? I rather he be an illegitimate child. For Feng Jinyuan that commoner man, why should my mother give birth to a son for him? He deserves to wear a green hat! I am happy he is dead, I am tranquil, I no longer want to have any connections to his Feng family. But if he leaves this spawn at my side, and my mother was the one to give birth to him…… Dong Ying, say, should I strangle this vile spawn to death?”
Dong Ying could not understand Feng Fendai’s logic, this was a good thing, Xiao Bao was a vile spawn only because he was born from that actor, but why was it the reverse for Fendai? Of course, she also knew about the hatred Feng Fendai had for the Feng family. For the children in the Feng family, who did not hate Feng Jinyuan? For Feng Chenyu who died first, it was likely that she hated her father too!