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"Ah, oniisan-senpai, I’m here–"
It was a weekend afternoon and I had just arrived in front of a bench in the corner of an idyllic park full of parents and children.
Wearing the School for Exorcists middle school uniform in crumpled gyaru-fashion, Mei lightly waved to me.
"Gee, you really do look like you’ve been working hard. Your eyes look even deader than usual, you know?"
While sitting on the bench, Mei said so teasingly.
She had slightly wavy hair, fine white skin which could be seen peeking out from her crumpled school uniform, and accessories that casually asserted her presence. Each seemed to accentuate her fine feminine curves. Her soft warm aura and loose clothes made her feel unguarded and added a strange charm to Mei who normally had a cute appearance.
In terms of both age and aura, she seemed to be the polar opposite of a certain scary childhood friend I knew.
I sat down next to Mei and asked,
"So what’s this good job you told me about?"
"You’re cutting to the chase straight away, oniisan-senpai? Since you and I are friends, why don’t we chat for a little bit longer to confirm our mutual love before getting down to business?"
"Mei, here’s the thing with work… it has taken away any energy I might’ve had to go along with your jokes."
"Hmm, sounds to me like you have ennui."
Mei said jokingly then cleared her throat and began to explain.
"Oniisan-senpai, have you heard of spiritual disaster counseling rooms?"
"…if I remember correctly, they’re small offices managed by exorcists in normal middle schools and high schools, right?"
It was the strong emotional energy of humans that caused the outbreak of spiritual phenomena.
Although I didn’t understand the details, strange things tended to happen in places where people’s emotions swirled.
In that sense, schools had always been a troublesome place.
Schools were unique environments where hundreds of emotionally immature adolescent boys and girls were crammed into one place regardless of whether they wanted to be there or not–it was like begging for spiritual phenomena to occur. If evil spirits also happened to be present, it wasn’t unusual for monsters to appear; spiritual phenomena that used living humans for their cores.
Spiritual disaster counseling rooms were a system that involved stationing several exorcists at every school to deal with these frequent spiritual phenomena as quickly as possible.
"Wow, despite your grades oniisan-senpai, you know about spiritual disaster counseling rooms?"
"Shut up. Wait, how do you know about my grades…?"
Although I tried pursuing the matter, Mei kept evasively dodging the question so I dropped the subject without thinking too much about it.
"Spiritual disaster counseling rooms are certainly good places to work at but I thought there weren’t many job openings available?"
After all, it was a job with a low chance of getting injured.
Moreover, since it mainly involved engaging in prevention and early countermeasures against spiritual phenomena, it was a highly competitive job where past achievements were likely to be evaluated even though it did not involve much danger. It was not a position that students who had not even obtained temporary licenses could normally get into.
"After I put in a good word for you, resolving that problem will be as easy as pie, hehehe."
Mei gave me a thumbs up with a suspicious-looking smile.
This girl was quite the mysterious one…
I had no idea where she got her information from and could sense that she had strange connections from moments like now. Therefore, I thought that she was probably related to something on the level of the Kuzunoha Family. The problem was that I’d never even heard of anyone with Tachikawa for their surname.
"However, I can’t just do this for free since this is obviously such a yummy job."
Mei held up her index finger.
"Sure."
I prepared myself for what the terms would be. I was ready to accept whatever odd job she had!
"I want a lap pillow."
"…mm?
"Please give me a lap pillow right here. Around thirty minutes or so will be enough."
"What?"
My thoughts froze for a moment as I remained uncomprehending of Mei’s words.
"Ah, no wait, you usually ask me to do things like treating you to a movie or carrying your bags, don’t you?
"What are you talking about? I am getting you such a yummy job. Do you think money or time can buy it? Mei is currently at the age where she yearns for human touch. She wants to be pampered."
"….so basically, you’re telling me to pay with my body…?"
"Don’t talk like that, please."
Not surprisingly, Mei seemed to feel embarrassed as she suddenly turned her face away from me.
"So, what will you do? Will you give Mei a lap pillow or not?"
She started making small "tick, tick, tick" noises with her mouth as if she were setting a time limit.
"…do I really need to do this?"
Even if most of them were parents and their children, it was currently the weekend and the park was full of people. Wasn’t Mei asking a bit much of me?
However, if I missed this opportunity, once the week started only the daily hell of having to carry two useless idiots would await me.
"Damn it, do whatever you want!"
After resolving myself, I made a comfortable spot in my lap by slightly spreading and relaxing my knees.
"You’ve surrendered more readily than I expected, oniisan-senpai."
Mei gave me a wicked smile and put her head on my lap, nuzzling her face into my belly with an "Uryaa–"
"Hey, wait, where do you think you’re putting your face!"
She was hitting various parts down there and I could even feel her warm breath permeating and spreading through the area near my stomach…!
This was more than a lap pillow, wasn’t it!?
"Since you were brought up in a church, you don’t have any immunity against the opposite sex, oniisan-senpai…"
When I tried to twist free, Mei wrapped her arms around my waist and locked me in place as if saying, "You think I’ll let you escape?"
"So I need to make sure you get your vaccinations and mark you so that you don’t get led astray by the girls in your team."
I didn’t know how serious she was being but she continued rubbing her head against an inappropriate part of my body while going, "Uriuri"
Mei eventually released me after well past thirty minutes and in a good mood, promised to settle the matter concerning the spiritual disaster consultation room.
…somehow, I felt like I’d been toyed with by a woman as mischievous as a nine-tailed fox spirit that weekend.