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Olivia, now being princess-carried by Kaito, found herself flustered and unable to settle her thoughts.
(How should I even describe this? M- Miyama Kaito-samas honorable countenance is so close, its radiance feels like its burning my eyes. This is entirely different from the time he carried me on his back during our visit to Heros Hill. Though the situation remains the same, Miyama Kaito-sama carrying me, the difference between being carried from the front and the back makes it feel worlds apart.)
When Kaito carried her on his back before, she had been flustered but managed to remain somewhat composed. Now, however, she was anything but calm. Her thoughts swirled in circles, unable to settle, and her body felt strangely feverish.
It wasnt unreasonable for Olivia to feel this way. Being held like this, with Kaitos face so close and their bodies pressed together, made it impossible for her to stay composed.
(Would it be disrespectful to gaze at Miyama Kaito-sama from this close? Of course, I understand that Miyama Kaito-sama would never accuse me of being disrespectful, but to be this close to someone I revere as if my God Could it not be a deviation from the proper way to uphold my faith? Yet, even so, I cant look away. How beautiful, how divine his presence is. Lifting me so effortlessly while walking with such calm eyes fixed ahead Surely, this sacred visage should be immortalized in a painting and displayed in a grand cathedral.)
Incidentally, Olivias face, as she gazed up at Kaito with a heated expression, was the very image of a girl deeply in love. However, she herself insisted it was merely devotion, and she lacked the objectivity to recognize her feelings for what they truly were.
(First and foremost though, I must reflect on myself My inadequacy caused Miyama Kaito-sama unnecessary trouble No, thats not right. Reflection, regret, self-admonishment- those can all come later. What I should focus on now is)
Her thoughts wandered as she turned her gaze toward Kaori, who was walking happily and enjoying the scenery. The perspective Kaori had shared earlier had been deeply enlightening for Olivia.
Though Olivia was exceedingly earnest, she wasnt rigid in her thinking. Even if an idea or behavior differed from her current values, she was open-minded enough to adopt opinions she found truly valid, using them to better herself.
(To be carried by the great Miyama Kaito-sama is an honor far beyond what I deserve- a miracle, a blessing so rare it must be cherished. In that case, instead of drowning my thoughts in shame and regret, shouldnt I be expressing gratitude and embracing this unexpected happiness? But then this may b- be something that cant be allowed I- It might be unforgivable, terribly irreverent, but perhaps I could lean on Miyama Kaito-sama just a little more)
Encouraged by Kaoris way of thinking, Olivia decided to fully accept the happiness of the present moment. She let her body relax just slightly.
As a result, she became more acutely aware of Kaitos hands beneath her knees and around her back, and her body her face ended up leaning more closely against his shoulder.
(So warm. What a strange feeling. My heart should be a storm of unrest, yet at the same time, I feel a profound sense of peace and happiness. Its as if two conflicting emotions coexist within me, yet it feels so right. Above all, simply being this close to Miyama Kaito-sama Being allowed to remain near him brings me such joy.)
Her entire body felt as though it was on the verge of boiling over, yet somehow, that heat carried a strange sense of comfort. For Olivia, this was an unfamiliar and uncharted emotion.
No, she had felt this way before, on some occasions. But those feelings the emotions she had always suppressed as mere worldly thoughts Now, as she allowed herself to accept them, brought an inexplicable ticklish sensation and an overwhelming sense of comfort.
She didnt yet know what to call this feeling But it wasnt unpleasant, and it didnt seem like something unnecessary or something that ought to be rejected.
(Truly, I am so disgraceful and irreverent today I must reflect on this thoroughly later. Even though Im causing Miyama Kaito-sama trouble, even though I should be reprimanding myself for my inadequacy I still cant help but wish to remain like this for much longer.)
As she entertained such thoughts in her mind, Olivia leaned gently against Kaitos shoulder, her expression softening in a way that seemed almost dependent. A small smile graced her lips.
Serious-senpai : [T- This is bad Now that I think about it, Olivia is like a ticking time bomb, isnt she? I mean, shes completely unaware that what shes feeling is love, yet her affection for Kaito just keeps skyrocketing. Whats going to happen when she finally realizes its love? Hyihh]