Published at 16th of September 2024 1:15 am

Chapter 16 A Moment of Uncertainty

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The sun was setting over the Hidden Leaf Village, casting a warm orange glow over the training grounds where Tsunade and Jiraiya had spent much of their youth. Now both in their early twenties, their missions had grown more dangerous, their responsibilities heavier, but the two of them still shared a bond that had formed back when they were mere genin, under the guidance of the Third Hokage.

They were no longer children, though. The playful banter and competitive sparring had given way to something deeper, something unspoken.

Tsunade sat on the edge of the training field, staring off into the distance. Her normally confident demeanor was clouded by something that even she had trouble naming. For the past week, she had been distracted, her thoughts swirling in directions she never expected.

Jiraiya strolled up to her, hands stuffed into his pockets, his usual mischievous grin in place. "Hey, Tsunade. You’ve been pretty quiet lately. What’s up? You finally tired of beating me up during training?"

Tsunade glanced at him but didn’t smile. "Not in the mood, Jiraiya."

Jiraiya’s grin faltered, his brow furrowing with concern. It wasn’t like Tsunade to be so distant. Sure, she’d always been tough and more serious than him, but she usually threw back some kind of sarcastic jab or at least a punch when he annoyed her.

He sat down next to her, for once not trying to joke his way through the silence. "Come on, Tsunade. Something’s obviously bothering you. You know you can talk to me."

Tsunade let out a slow breath. She had been dreading this moment, but there was no running from it. Not anymore. The signs were all there—missed cycles, the strange queasy feeling in her stomach every morning, and the exhaustion that hit her harder than any mission ever had.

She glanced at Jiraiya, his carefree attitude somehow comforting and frustrating at the same time. How could he just sit there, grinning, without a care in the world, when her entire life might be about to change?

"I… I think I might be pregnant," she said, her voice quiet but firm.

The words hung in the air, heavy and unshakable.

Jiraiya froze, his grin slipping completely as his eyes widened. He opened his mouth to speak but found himself at a complete loss for words. "W-What?"

Tsunade looked down at her hands, her fingers gripping the edge of the wooden bench. "I don’t know for sure. I haven’t taken a test or anything, but… I’m late, and there are other signs. I’ve been feeling strange for a few weeks now. It… it could be from our last time."

Jiraiya’s mind was spinning. He and Tsunade had crossed a line in their relationship not too long ago. It had been after a particularly rough mission when emotions were running high, and for a brief moment, they had let their guard down—two shinobi who carried too many burdens, finding comfort in each other.

But the possibility of Tsunade being pregnant? That wasn’t something he had even considered. "Are you sure?" he asked, his voice softer now, without the usual bravado. "I mean… I know you wouldn’t bring it up if you weren’t serious, but—"

Tsunade cut him off, her frustration bubbling to the surface. "Of course, I’m not sure, Jiraiya! Do you think I wanted this? I’m a kunoichi, I’m one of the best medical ninjas in the world—I should’ve been more careful. But I wasn’t, and now… now I’m dealing with this."

Jiraiya swallowed hard, feeling the weight of the situation hit him all at once. He’d always been the carefree one, the guy who never took life too seriously, but this was real. This was Tsunade, and if she was pregnant, then their lives were about to change forever.

"I… I’m sorry," he said, his voice sincere, though unsure of what else to say. "I didn’t mean for things to get like this. But… if you are… pregnant, then we’ll figure it out. Together."

Tsunade looked at him, surprised by the seriousness in his voice. She had half-expected Jiraiya to make a joke, to brush it off like everything else in his life. But there was no hint of his usual flippancy. He looked at her, really looked at her, and she could see that he was just as scared and uncertain as she was.

"I don’t even know if I can handle this," she admitted, her voice softer now. "I’m a ninja, Jiraiya. We live dangerous lives. How can I be a mother in a world like this? I never wanted this, and I’m not sure if I’m ready for it."

Jiraiya ran a hand through his hair, his heart pounding in his chest. He didn’t have any answers, but one thing was clear—he cared about Tsunade more than he ever realized. The thought of her going through this alone wasn’t something he could accept.

"We’ll take it one step at a time," he said, his tone gentle but firm. "Look, Tsunade, I know I’m an idiot most of the time. But I’m here for you. Whatever happens, you don’t have to do this by yourself."

Tsunade’s throat tightened, and for a moment, she couldn’t speak. Jiraiya had always been the goofy one, the one who drove her crazy with his antics, but in this moment, he was offering her the kind of support she hadn’t expected. It touched something deep inside her.

"I don’t know if I can keep it," she said, finally letting the thought out, the one that had been eating away at her since she first suspected. "I don’t even know if I want to."

Jiraiya’s face softened, understanding the weight of her words. He nodded slowly. "It’s your choice, Tsunade. Whatever you decide… I’ll be there. No matter what."

The silence that followed was heavy but not uncomfortable. For once, Jiraiya didn’t feel the need to fill it with jokes or banter. He simply sat beside Tsunade, letting her process everything at her own pace.

After what felt like an eternity, Tsunade finally spoke again, her voice quieter, more vulnerable than he had ever heard it. "I just… I don’t want to lose myself. I’ve trained my whole life to be a ninja. I don’t know how to be anything else."

Jiraiya nodded, understanding completely. "I get that. But you’re more than just a ninja, Tsunade. You’re one of the strongest people I know. And whatever you decide, you’ll get through it. You always do."

Tsunade looked at him, really looked at him, for what felt like the first time in weeks. Despite everything, despite the fear and the uncertainty, there was a part of her that felt strangely comforted by his presence.

"I guess I’ll need to find out for sure," she said, her voice a little steadier now. "I’ll visit the hospital tomorrow and get a test done."

Jiraiya nodded. "And I’ll be here. Whatever happens, you won’t have to face it alone."

Tsunade glanced at him, her expression softening ever so slightly. "Thanks, Jiraiya."

He grinned, some of his usual playfulness returning. "Hey, that’s what I’m here for. Just… try not to punch me in the face when I say something stupid, okay?"

Tsunade couldn’t help but chuckle, shaking her head. "No promises."

As the sun finally dipped below the horizon, casting the village in twilight, Tsunade and Jiraiya sat together in silence. They didn’t have all the answers, but for now, they had each other. And that was enough.

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The End

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