Published at 26th of March 2019 12:07 am

Volume 5, Part 5

I head out to meet with Haruaki.

While speeding along the darkened streets, an old conversation I had with Haruaki runs through my mind.

—I had a crush on Kiri.

The day after Daiya had returned to school, Haruaki told me that.

I had just explained the 'boxes' to him. After deciding to fight against Daiya, I had decided that Haruaki had to be in on the battle. It was early evening, just about the time when kids headed home after playing all day. We were in a park, and Haruaki was sitting on a loudly creaking swing.

"———"

After I was done, he remained silent for a while, swaying back and forth on the swing. For a few moments, all I could hear was the squeaking of the swing.

His violent movements almost threw him through a full 360 degree arc. I felt sorry for involving Haruaki, but it was a decision I had made after thoroughly considering all of my options. I had no regrets. That's what I told myself, anyway.

That was when he told me: "I had a crush on Kiri."

He confessed that he used to be in love with Kokone, all of a sudden and without any context. Was it meant to counter my tale?

"Eh...?"

I was surprised at first, but it made sense.

Haruaki had turned down all the offers he received from renowned baseball schools in favor of our high school, yet our inferior baseball program barely allowed him to aim for the national championship. He had sacrificed his future career as a professional baseball player. I knew this because Maria had found out about it within the repeating world, and then told me about it later.

I had always wondered why he had done so.

And now I knew why.

Haruaki chose to go to the same school as Daiya and Kokone, even if he had to give up on his dreams and his prospects. I don't know if he wanted to declare his love eventually or if he had some other goal, but he found it necessary.

The swing had come to a halt, and Haruaki was now standing up. He continued:

"Oh, but you know? I don't have those feelings for her anymore. Mmm, how should I put it? She used to be terribly insecure and fragile, and seemed to need someone to protect her. I wanted to be that person, you see!"

He swung himself gently to the creaking of the swing.

"But you can't protect someone with such a half-assed resolve. Jeez, can you believe how presumptuous I was?"

His tone was light, but I'm sure he had to go through a lot before reaching that conclusion.

"So you're really not in love with her anymore?"

"Yeah. So don't mind me if you want to go out with Kiri, Hoshii! You guys would make a good match."

I don't know if he was being honest.

All I know is that he's not attached to any girl in particular. He's never said anything, but I'm pretty sure that he's popular with the girls—especially from other schools—because he's a baseball ace. He was confessed to by several girls, and he even dated some of them. However, most of those relationships ended very quickly. He no longer accepts confessions anymore.

I can only guess at how he felt while dating them, how they broke up, or why he stopped accepting confessions.

But I'm sure that Kokone and Daiya played a role.

"What about Daiya?"

"Mm?"

"Don't you think that Daiya and Kokone should go out?"

Haruaki didn't answer right away. He stopped swinging and waited for the swing to come to a standstill. Before all momentum was lost, he jumped from the swing with a "Ho!", landed, and said point-blank:

"No."

"Why not? Aren't they a—"

"Unlike me, Daiya is able to make a resolution that's not half-assed."

He probably read my face - what the heck are you talking about - and continued with a wry smile:

"Because of that, they can't be happy together."

I couldn't understand right away.

"That's not love! Their relationship just isn't healthy."

At the time, I had no knowledge of their childhood experiences, so his words left me confused.

But I knew someone who resembled Daiya.

Someone who sacrificed her own happiness for the sake of others'.

So I instinctively understood that their relationship was messed up and had already ended.

"Then why did you give up on Kokone? If you think Daiya's out of the picture, why hold back?"

"You're completely missing the point. I'm not holding back! Didn't you listen at all? There's just no need to protect her anymore! My feelings have already changed!"

"...Has Kokone gotten strong enough to protect herself?"

"That's not what I said."

"Huh?"

"She's still as weak as before! People can't change so easily, after all. But there is no need to protect her anymore. Because—"

That moment, Haruaki made an expression I had never seen before on his face.

It wasn't anger, hatred, or pity. With a smile that gave me the chills, he said:

"Kiri is already broken."

Later, I realized what feeling had been buried behind his smile.

It was—

Resignation.

✵

Haruaki was waiting for me at that same park. It was only two to three minutes from Maria's apartment on foot. This time around, it was completely dark.

Haruaki and Yuuri-san were sitting on a bench, illuminated by a streetlight.

"Kazuki-san..."

Yuuri-san looks up at me with teary eyes. I still feel sorry for her, but I don't get upset at the sight of her tears anymore. After all, I've been putting up with her constant crying for a while now. I've gotten completely used to her broken tear ducts.

Yuuri-san is sitting obediently on the bench of her own free will. Haruaki told me over the phone that when he approached her, she chose to listen to him.

"Haruaki, just to confirm: what was she doing?"

"Well, like I told you, she was strolling about near Maria-chan's apartment. She didn't resist or lose her temper, either, and she even explained the situation that she's in! Apparently, she was [controlled] by Daiyan to spy on what you and Maria-chan are doing."

"Mm."

I already expected this. I knew that Daiya would use the people he can [control] to spy on us because he can't leave that cinema.

That being said—

"Yuuri-san. Is it really okay to tell us what Daiya ordered you to do?"

After all, doing so hinders Daiya.

"Yes, it is. I can't say for sure, but I think his 'box' isn't powerful enough to completely dominate me."

My heart aches when I hear the word 'box' coming from her mouth. Even though she’d been lucky enough to forget about the 'boxes', she’s now forced to remember them. And the more vivid the memory becomes, the more she will blame herself.

But now is not the time to pity Yuuri-san. For the time being, I have to suck her dry of information.

"Yuuri-san, could you go into detail about what you know?"

"Yes... Ah, please remember that I cannot hide anything from Oomine-san. If he [commands] me to speak, I must obey. So be careful what you say to me."

"Okay, I understand."

But is it really okay for her to tell me even that? I guess she hasn't become Daiya's ally just because he used his 'box' on her.

"You were [controlled] by Daiya to spy on me and Maria, correct?"

"Right. We were [ordered] to find out what you have done to him and what you are going to do next. Moreover, he [ordered] those who have discovered something new to enter the 'box' that he's imprisoned in."

"Daiya told you to enter the 'Wish-Crushing Cinema'?"

Does that mean that his [servants] can't directly convey their discoveries to him?

"How do you experience such an [order], Yuuri-san? As far as I can see, your mind seems perfectly clear, and you don't seem brainwashed, either."

"Yes, it is nothing like brainwashing. Most likely, I am merely forced to obey his [orders]."

"How powerful are they? And what happens if you reject one?"

"...I don't know exactly what would happen if I ignored one of his [orders]. Perhaps there will be no penalty at all, but as a matter of principle, I cannot defy him."

"Is it absolutely impossible to avoid obeying his orders?"

"It is. And that probably applies to every [servant]. It feels a bit like my... soul is being held captive. The thought of disobeying him feels like throwing my life away."

"I see... Why didn't you resist Haruaki, then, when he approached you? Doesn't that mean that you disobeyed Daiya? Why were you able to do that?"

Yuuri-san uneasily casts her eyes to the ground.

"If Haruaki-san weren't a friend of yours, I might have tried to escape."

"What do you mean?"

"My [order] was to spy on you and Otonashi-san, so getting caught by a friend of yours and waiting for you to come here is in accordance with my instructions."

So, basically...

"You're talking with me because of your [order]?"

It's certainly true that she can gather information on me this way.

Yuuri-san gives me a faint, apologetic nod.

"But please believe me: as you may have noticed, we are not bereft of will. We are merely given instructions that we have to follow. Thus, I am still your Yuuri," she says as she takes my hand and looks into my eyes. "I am still on your side."

I feel the warmth of her hands, which naturally makes me blush.

...Yeah, indeed. Yuuri-san's always getting me all flustered, and I can never tell if she's doing it deliberately or not.

"One thing's bothering me a little," Haruaki says as he breaks his silence. "You aren't the only one who's spying on Hoshii - other people are on the move as well, right?"

Yuuri-san has been saying "we".

In order to collect information, moving a single person would not be optimal. If possible, Daiya would [order] several people at a time.

Yuuri-san tightens her grip on my hands and answers the question.

"Yes. I think the [order] has gone to all [servants]."

"To... all?"

"Yes, to all."

—What does that mean for me? I mean, there's a large number of [servants] in our school alone.

And all of them are after us...?!

"...How many [servants] are there?"

"...Almost a thousand."

"A, thou———"

I'm left speechless.

I imagine being surrounded by a thousand people in this park, getting cornered and yelled at to spit out everything. To confess everything.

The YouTube video of people in the city prostrating themselves before Daiya, submitting to him, crosses my mind.

There were just ten or so people involved that time. Despite that, the sight had enough impact to make it onto TV. He made such a strong impression that after seeing it, my sister Luu-chan even asked whether people like him would revolutionize the world. There must have been many others who had similar thoughts after seeing the video.

Most likely, Daiya merely gave them the [order] to "prostrate themselves before him with tears in their eyes."

He achieved a huge impact just by doing that.

But Daiya is able to make a thousand people do the same thing.

I once saw a TV report on group psychology that dealt with the following question: how many strangers on a crowded street have to look up at the sky before other pedestrians start to look up, even though there's nothing to see?

The answer is three. If there are three people looking up at the sky, you suspect there is something there and are tempted to look up as well. Then, someone else sees you and the original three people looking up and also starts looking up. Through this herding effect, a large number of people end up looking up at the sky for no good reason.

A mere three individuals can have that powerful an impact.

Now, what if a thousand people were to act in tandem?

For example, if a thousand people rushed to the same restaurant, you could easily start a trend. If you found a blog that upset you, you could easily terrorize the writer psychologically by making them attack him over the web. No... these ideas are still fairly trivial. You don't need a thousand people to execute them.

A thousand people would be able to wield power that exceeds the grasp of my imagination.

Besides, that number isn't the maximum that Daiya can [control], so he can still increase his power even further.

Ugh, I'm starting to realize just how powerful his 'box' is.

Without exaggeration, Daiya's 'box' does have the power to change the world.

And right now—

—He is using that power just to defeat me.

Before I knew it, my fingers have started to tremble.

"...Yuuri-san? How specific was that [order]? From what I gathered, Daiya didn't give you detailed instructions, right," I ask while keeping my uneasiness in check.

"Yes, there were no specific instructions, so we can choose how to follow his [order]. Also, we won't do anything that goes against our moral values. We're all doing our best to execute the [order] to the extent that it's feasible. I don't know what apartment Otonashi-san lives in, but I happen to know that she lives in that apartment block, which is why I came here."

"...Umm."

I think about what Yuuri-san has just told me.

"So for example, if you knew what room she's in, you wouldn't be able to intrude by breaking the window because you think doing so is wrong?"

"Exactly."

So is the power of [orders] surprisingly restricted?

I stop and shake my head before I start relaxing. No. I can't feel relieved: Yuuri-san may not be able to break in, but there might be others who can.

...After all, there are people who readily break windows without requiring an [order]...... like Maria…or Maria…or Maria.[3]

"Okay, Yuuri-san, now I understand why you're in this park. Also, let me confirm one thing: you said you were able to come here because you knew which apartment block Maria lives in, right? Does that mean that the others can't get here because they don't know of her location?"

"Yes. They cannot get here."

"...Can't you share information among [servants]?"

"No... it feels like we are connected somewhere deep in our minds... but our actual thoughts are not connected. Therefore, my knowledge of Otonashi-san's whereabouts is not conveyed to them."

"But guys," Haruaki suddenly cuts in with a frown. "Why would you need any special abilities to share information? I mean, couldn't you just use your cell phone?"

Yuuri-san's eyes widen at his question.

"Y-You're right. Why didn't I notice? ...Oh no... I can do that, actually...," she stutters and pales. "Now that you gave me that idea, I have to do it."

She takes out her cell phone.

"Eh?"

Yuuri-san? What are you doing?

Is she trying to get in touch with...? But didn't she just say she was on my side?

But as a matter of fact, Yuuri-san has started typing on her cell phone with widened eyes and trembling lips.

In order to defeat me.

Before I can get a grip on what's going on, she writes an e-mail and is about to send it when Haruaki suddenly grabs her from behind.

"Ugh...!"

She accidentally drops her cell phone.

"Dammit! Sorry Hoshii! My bad!"

"...eh, huh?"

"Don't you get it, Hoshii? Yuuri-senpai told us about the 'Shadow of Sin and Punishment' even though it puts Daiyan at a disadvantage. She is able to oppose him to a certain extent, so she is trying to help us as much as she can. But she still has to take the best measures that she's aware of to complete her [order]. Right, Yuuri-senpai?"

She nods slightly while gazing at me with tears in her eyes.

"Exactly. Oh my... what, what should I do...?"

"You're powerless against me physically, so I can hold you back like this if you want," Haruaki suggests.

"N-No, I think it's pointless if you stop me. It merely slipped my mind that I could have gotten in touch with the others, but someone else is bound to come up with the same idea. If someone locates Otonashi-san, that person will call or email another [servant]. After that, it's just a matter of time. The information will spread further and further...!"

"Uh, I see. You're right... Hoshii, some [servant] might already know Maria-chan's address. You should take off."

"B-But..."

If I do that, Maria will surely realize that I am in the middle of a fight against Daiya and his 'box'. I must avoid that at any cost.

But could we even get away from the [servants]?

I mean, a thousand people are searching for us.

On a whim, I open up a browser window and search for my name.

The result of the real-time search makes me go pale.

"RT: (IMPORTANT) student Kazuki Hoshino and Maria Otonashi missing - last will found by his sister. Report if you see them. Details in 2nd tweet."[4]

"Wha—"

What is that?

Even my home address is being referenced on the Internet. The twitter page of the original tweeter is practically empty before that tweet; he has obviously registered just to post that message. In addition, he has even uploaded a picture of me and Maria on her motorcycle.

In part due to Maria's looks, his tweets have spread rapidly in the short time since they were posted. Some tweeters have expressed doubts as to the legitimacy of the tweet, but that doesn't matter: people will blindly spread the message under the rationale of "searching for missing students."

Maybe some of the [servants] have already seen that tweet?

I unconsciously raise my head and look around.

I see a business woman strolling along and staring at her cell phone, a middle-aged man taking his dog for a walk, and a cap-wearing middle school student riding a bicycle.

—my eyes meet with the student's.

...Maybe that student is looking for me, too. Maybe he has read that tweet, too. Maybe he's a [servant]. It would come as no surprise if that boy called a thousand other people to close in on us.

My thoughts cause me to freeze.

Fortunately, the boy averts his gaze without any special reaction.

"———Ugh."

Why am I frightened of a middle school boy...?

...But I can't dismiss it as a mere overreaction, either. It's a fact that there are a lot of [servants] around. On top of that, they are random people that don't stand out, unlike uniformed policemen for example.

"...Yuuri-san...," I say while hiding my uneasiness. "You said that it's impossible to do things that are against your moral values, right? So would you be able to intrude upon us if we locked ourselves into Maria's room?"

"I can't. But there might be less moral people among the [servants]. No... I'm afraid there definitely are some. There are also fanatical believers in Oomine-san. I think they would do anything for the sake of his [orders], so they could break into an apartment without a second thought..."

So it's possible that someone, upon reading that tweet, will go to my home and attack my family?

"You or Otonashi-san... might be tortured...!"

Close to tears, Yuuri-san struggles to free herself from Haruaki and send her e-mail.

I guess she really doesn't want to contact anyone, but it doesn't look like she's able to stop herself. Probably because the act of e-mailing someone in and of itself doesn't violate her ethics, even though it may have some less than innocent consequences. Otherwise, she wouldn't even be keeping an eye on us.

That's how powerful an [order] is.

"...just how can I..."

We are pursued by a thousand people. They're all racking their brains in order to catch Maria and me and gather information on us.

It's just a matter of time. We won't be able to hang on until the ‘Wish-Crushing Cinema’ is over.

...Ah, no, it's much worse. The current situation where a thousand people are investigating us is still fairly innocuous.

If Daiya fails to get the information he wants, he won't stick to the same [order] forever. He has a time limit. If he runs out of time, he'll take a more direct approach. The current [order] is just an initial move—a tentative move with his "pawns" to catch a glimpse of my reaction.

"Yuuri-san?"

If there's no progress, Daiya will use a more effective and certain way to get out of the ‘Wish-Crushing Cinema’.

Namely—

"What if he [orders] you to kill me?"

—Killing the 'owner'.

That's obviously immoral. Something that shouldn't be possible according to her explanation.

Nonetheless, Yuuri-san replies firmly. "I would kill you."

"...Why would you be able to do that?"

I think I already understand, but I want her to confirm it for me.

"An [order] itself has to be executed no matter what. Our moral values make no difference at all. For example, the current [order] was to find what you're doing. We are forced to obey, but the means we use are at our discretion. I consider trespassing a crime, so I can refrain from doing so. But if the [order] itself were to break into her apartment, I would be left with no other choice. Moral values become irrelevant."

The more concrete Daiya makes his [orders], the mightier his [control] becomes. The current [order] was only vague because he lacks insight into the overall situation.

At the moment, he may want to avoid murder, but he might resort to it if cornered.

If that happens, I'll be pursued by a thousand killers.

I have to do something.

What's my best option...?

"......Yuuri-san."

Still restrained by Haruaki's hold, she raises her head.

"I'll tell you everything about our current situation."

"Eh?"

The cry of astonishment came from Haruaki.

"Are you serious, Hoshii? [Servants] who have discovered something have to go to Daiyan! If he gets more info, his attacks will definitely get more intense!"

"I have no other choice. Besides... I bet Daiya has already guessed with high precision what Maria and I are doing right now. In that case, it's better to give him an appropriate amount of information and have him think that it's not that hard for him to escape."

That way, he won't have to resort to killing the 'owner'.

"There's one more reason. I want to send Yuuri-san into the 'Wish-Crushing Cinema'."

"Eh?"

Still held down by Haruaki's arms, Yuuri-san widens her eyes

"You don't like Daiya, right, Yuuri-san?"

She remains still for a moment... but then, perhaps guessing what I am getting at, she lifts the corner of her mouth slightly.

"That's right. I hate him."

Knowing that she's going to get a piece of information, she stops struggling against Haruaki. With a face that looks almost pleased, she continues:

"I will never forgive him for killing me and exposing my hideous corpse to you in that killer game. If I can discover his emotional scars, I want to twist a knife in them, make him feel intense pain and agony, and drive him to suicide."

...Uh, well... I never asked for all that...and you're freaking me out...and hell, Haruaki has even let go of you because what you said was so alarming...

"...A-Anyway, you're on my side, right?"

"Yes."

Yuuri-san is quite cunning and clever, despite her cute appearance. She's also got plenty of guts.

In other words: she's a Trojan Horse.

If she's with Daiya, she can hinder his actions.

After that, I told Yuuri-san that I was deceiving Maria.

I also told her to go to the shopping mall in order to enter the ‘Wish-Crushing Cinema’. She told me that she already instinctively knew that because Daiya had used the 'Shadow of Sin and Punishment' on her. Supposedly, his 'box' is shared, and I should consider her to be 'owner'-like.

I don't know why, but when I heard that, I couldn't help thinking that—it resembles Maria's 'box' a little.

It's hard to explain just why I felt that way, but if I had to say something, "they give off a similar feeling" is probably the best answer that I can come up with.

They are based on strong emotions, yet they are cold and fragile, and I can't understand their underlying motives. They are 'boxes' whose meanings I cannot grasp.

Probably because of that line of thought, a new idea crosses my mind.

Ah, could it be that the one who understands her best is no longer me, but Daiya Oomine?

I shake my head.

Why am I suddenly getting off track?

I should be thinking about Daiya's plans instead.

"Hey, Hoshii," Haruaki opens his mouth. "Daiya will go for Kiri!"

Right. I think so, too.

Therefore—

Right now I have to protect Kokone - not Maria.

scene 3: Repeat, Reset, Reset

1. CLASSROOM Classroom of the first year high school students, class six; after school. It's the 1533rd iteration of the 'Rejecting Classroom'. Outside the windows, the sky is as cloudy as it was during the first 1532 iterations. MARIA OTONASHI is sitting on the teacher's desk and talking to DAIYA OOMINE. He has guessed that MARIA is more than just a regular transfer student and seems to be wary of her. DAIYA ...Don't look at me. I don't like your gaze. It feels like you could see right through me. MARIA That's closer to the truth than you may think. After all, I know far more than a normal transfer student could ever know on her first day. I've checked up on every single one of my classmates in search of the 'owner' of the 'Rejecting Classroom'. DAIYA flashes a sardonic smile and takes on a mocking stance. DAIYA You're not making any sense. But let me ask you then: what do you know? MARIA I know what's on Kokone Kirino's back. DAIYA's face visibly tenses up. DAIYA ...How do you know about that? If there's anything that Kiri would never show anyone, it's that. Even I've only seen it once. ...Hey, don't tell me you're one of the people who hurt her? MARIA It's the 22nd time. DAIYA What is? MARIA It's the 22nd time that you asked me that question after hearing about Kokone Kirino's back. DAIYA frowns. He doesn't remember posing that question before. As the only person who can retain her memories of the 'Rejecting Classroom', MARIA is also the only remaining witness. The memories of the time she has spent alone cross MARIA's mind and cause her to sigh in exhaustion. MARIA Let me explain how I found out. First off, I have already... (TIME LAPSE) MARIA tells DAIYA that she has experienced the same March 2nd 1533 times. For a while, DAIYA listens quietly to what she says without saying a word. DAIYA I see. You mentioned Kiri's back because you wanted me to believe your absurd story. But girl, you could have hired a detective or whatever to investigate Kiri's background. MARIA Do you want me to bring up an event that only you and one other person know about? DAIYA ...What? MARIA Your childhood friend Miyuki Karino confessed to you, but you rejected her. DAIYA's eyes widen at first, but he quickly suppresses his bewilderment. DAIYA Indeed, that's something only Rino and I know about. I haven't told anyone else, and I'm sure she hasn't, either. It's impossible to discover using ordinary means. MARIA I guess so. I wouldn't have found out if you hadn't told me yourself. DAIYA Impossible. Whether that 'Rejecting Classroom' really exists or not, I would never tell anyone about that. MARIA It makes sense that you would never do so under normal circumstances. You even said that yourself: that you never intended to tell anyone about the incident that led to Kirino's suffering. DAIYA scowls sternly at MARIA because she has mentioned a sore topic. His firm gaze disturbs MARIA, but she shows no sign of concern. She had already perfectly mastered concealing her emotions before the number of iterations hit four digits. MARIA There's a reason you told me. DAIYA Bullsh*t! I'm 100% certain there's no way I would have told you about that incident! His vehement objections cause MARIA to shrink back slightly, but she pretends to be unaffected and continues speaking. MARIA You told me about your darkest secret because you wanted to assist me. It was on the 1532nd iteration of March 2nd. DAIYA Are you nuts? To assist you? If you want to lie, at least make your lies believable! MARIA A 'box' can grant any 'wish'. DAIYA ...So what? MARIA Your demeanor changed when you realized that everything I had told you about the 'boxes' is true. You should know why, right? You have a 'wish' that you want to fulfill no matter what. DAIYA ......(wrinkles his brow) MARIA Looks like you have a hunch, huh. You want a 'box', so in exchange for your help, you asked me to help you get one. DAIYA ...(ponders)...But since I'm such a huge skeptic, I'd never buy that story about those 'boxes' and that 'Rejecting Classroom' so easily. Thus, I told you something you couldn't otherwise know—something about me and Rino—in order to give you leverage so that I'd believe you. To let a future me—that is, the 1553rd me—know that you're telling the truth. MARIA You got it. DAIYA ...Tch... I don't want to admit it, but that cold-blooded, results-oriented approach is totally me. Inwardly relieved, MARIA gets off the teacher's desk. She had sat on the desk to give herself a more powerful presence, but her good breeding made her uncomfortable while sitting there. DAIYA Now I know where I stand, but what about you? What do you get from telling me about this? MARIA I can make you my partner. DAIYA Do you really need one? MARIA You see, I'm stuck. I need to change my approach. DAIYA So if you need a partner, why did you choose me? MARIA That's just a rhetorical question, isn't it? You're the smartest person in this class. So much so that you were the first person I suspected of being the 'owner', even though there were no other reasons to suspect you. You're not on my suspect list anymore though, because you completely lack the awareness of being an 'owner'. DAIYA Smart, huh. Well, you're right about that, but that's still a pretty weak reason for insisting that I become your partner. I bet you've found yourself a bunch of other partners too, taking advantage of the fact that we don't remember anything, right? What a partner slut you are! MARIA Don't worry. I can't say anything about the future, but you're my first partner. You're also the first one I felt like cooperating with. Probably because— MARIA hesitates for a moment, but then she continues. MARIA You resemble me.

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