Published at 26th of March 2019 12:07 am

Volume 6, Part 2

◇◇◇ Kazuki Hoshino - 09/11 FRI 22:03 ◇◇◇

How can I describe this paradoxical feeling?

Nothing has changed within me, and yet I have clearly changed.

All that happened was that I came to understand myself better; I've read my own manual, so to speak. But that was enough to change my world. My whole body feels refreshed somehow, as though someone has poured menthol into my bloodstream. My mind becomes clearer minute by minute and everything muddying up my thoughts has disappeared.

The haze that hung over the world is clearing.

Now I can focus solely on saving Maria.

That's the change that occurred within me after I obtained the 'Empty Box'.

"Uwa, what's wrong with that girl?"

That's the first thing Haruaki says, his face chalky white, after he enters this tunnel. We're under an elevated railway that runs along the river on the outskirts of the city. His eyes are fixed on Iroha-san. She's passed out and is leaning against a wall covered with obscene graffiti that couldn't be further removed from "street art."

"D-Don't tell me you killed her... Hoshii?"

"She's alive!"

"B-But there's loads of blood...?"

Both the ground and the wall are splattered with a red liquid, as are her clothes and her face.

"That's just artificial blood."

"A-Artificial? Really?"

Haruaki squats down, touches the red liquid on the ground, and sniffs it. At first he wrinkles his brow, but he realizes that I was telling the truth and nods lightly a few times.

"Y-Yeah, that's not blood. But still, how did this happen? Why is she out like a light?"

He closely examines her face and checks her breath and pulse. From where I am standing, it's hard to make out her face because our source of light is a dim lantern.

What have I done to Iroha-san? Explaining that would take way too long, so I decide to answer just the first half of his question.

"Daiya and Iroha-san tricked me into betraying Maria in her presence. I completely fell for it, and now Maria's inside the 'Cinema'!"

"So Maria-chan has found out about Daiya's 'box'?"

"I guess so."

Haruaki knows how serious this is, so he stands up with a frown and gazes at me.

"Why didn't you call me before it came to this? Don't you trust me enough to rely on me?" he asks in a threatening tone. His height allows him to be quite intimidating when he pressures me like this.

"I do! I just couldn't call you because I was told to come alone." Even as I speak, I realize that that's not the only reason. "...No, I wouldn't have called you even if I hadn't been told that."

"But why?!" he shouts, vexed beyond belief that he wasn't able to stand by my side in my time of need.

What a great, reliable companion.

I'm really glad that we were able to become friends.

"It's the other way around! I'm really relying on you."

"Huh?"

"For real—I've been relying on you this whole time…"

Otherwise, I wouldn't have pulled him into this affair to begin with; I wouldn't be blaming myself for telling him about the 'boxes'

"...I-If you trust me, then why didn't you...?"

"You were with Kokone, weren't you? I wanted you to keep protecting her! You know why, don't you?"

"Ah..." Haruaki scratches his cheek abashedly. "Right... We thought that Daiyan would attack Kiri next."

"Yeah, chances were that this affair was just a red herring that Daiya set up."

Yes. We were sure that Daiya would aim for Kokone. We thought that Kokone was in more danger than Maria or I.

We had good reason to think so.

We thought that Daiya would have noticed by now that I'm not the 'owner' of the 'Wish-Crushing Cinema', and once that happened, he would attack its 'owner' before anyone else.

In that scenario, he would have attacked Kokone before Maria.

But he didn't.

"So Daiyan still hasn't realized who the real 'owner' is?"

"Looks like it."

The 'Wish-Crushing Cinema' exists for the sole purpose of destroying Daiya's 'box'.

He should have grasped its nature when Yuuri-san entered the cinema, because it's still only his past that's being displayed.

But then why hasn't he noticed that I'm not the 'owner'?

It's certainly possible that I would obtain a 'box'; as a matter of fact, I intended to reach out to 'O' and defeat Daiya with a 'box' if worse came to worst. Again, that'd only be in the worst case scenario, but I did plan for that contingency.

But even if I did obtain one, I wouldn't be able to wish for something like that. My 'box' would never be something like the 'Wish-Crushing Cinema.' I can't choose a 'box' that only saves Daiya.

I mean, such a box is only possible for someone who thinks about no one but Daiya from the bottom of his or her heart, isn't it?

It's impossible unless you're someone almost blindly fixated on Daiya, right?

There is no way I could deal with that. I consider him my friend and value our friendship, but I'm afraid my feelings for him are not strong enough to leave me blind to the rest of the world. I'm unable to embrace a 'wish' that is limited only to him and no one else.

If he had properly confronted himself with the question of who the 'owner' of that 'box' is rather than avoiding the issue, he would have realized as much.

But he couldn't.

Why?

Because his 'box' has led him astray.

If he can't even realize who the true 'owner' of the 'Cinema' is, it's clear that Daiya's methods are flawed. If he can't even recognize the person who has such strong feelings for him, it's clear that he's mistaken. Because Daiya is trying to become cold-hearted, he is deliberately shutting that person out of his mind. He's closing his mind, blinding himself.

Nonetheless, he claims his ultimate goal is oh-so-lofty?

He claims that he wants to correct the world even if he has to pay with his life?

"......hehe..."

Hilarious.

That's stupid.

Such a person could never accomplish anything of value.

A blind man wants to lead the way? I bet he'll end up wandering off in the wrong direction—he's only going to make things worse.

And for that he wants to deprive me of Maria?

Who does he think he is?

"......"

I look at Iroha-san, unconscious and covered in crimson red stains.

She was also wrong. She also tried to take Maria away from me.

That's why she got her just deserts.

I told Haruaki that Iroha-san's alive—and that's true—but I did steal her raison d'être. She might not be able to recover, as the miserable image she presents may well portend.

But so what?

".........hehehe..."

Yeah, I'll do the same to Daiya.

His despair will be orders of magnitude greater than Iroha-san's, for his 'wish' originates from within himself. He won't be able to recover when he finds out that his 'wish' won't ever come true. On top of that, he's responsible for Koudai Kamiuchi's death. A cruel reality is awaiting Daiya once he can't escape anymore.

But I'll crush him.

I don't give a sh*t about a blind man's 'wish'. It's his own fault if he dwindles into misery when his 'box' is crushed. You madman—you reap what you sow, don't you?

So.

Give Maria back to me already, you blind bastard.

scene 4: Piercing at Fifteen 1/3

1. RIVERSIDE - DUSK A broad river, viewed from midair, is glowing in the evening light. Two junior high school students in their last year, DAIYA and KOKONE, stand out from the crimson glow of twilight. They walk hand in hand while looking straight ahead. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) Daiya and I have been together for as long as I can remember. DAIYA squeezes her hand. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) He's present in my every memory. She releases her grip on his hand. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) The only way to move on from the past is by parting from him.

2. KOKONE'S ROOM - 17:00, HALF A YEAR AGO The two of them are sitting on KOKONE's bed, still wearing their school uniforms. KOKONE Mm... ahh... DAIYA pulls his lips away from hers. KOKONE is wearing glasses, and her hair is raven black. She casts her eyes down in an embarrassed manner. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) It's all thanks to Haru-kun that my relationship with Daiya finally changed. Only after seeing Haru-kun and me together did Daiya become aware of his feelings and ask me out. But in my honest opinion, it took him way too long to get here. DAIYA entwines his fingers with hers and begins stroking KOKONE's hair with his free hand. His gentle smile charms KOKONE and she presses her head against his chest. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) After all, I've always been in love with him, from the time we played house as kids. I was perfectly aware of my own feelings and his, even though he had yet to notice them himself. DAIYA puts his arm around KOKONE. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) Before going out with Daiya, I told Rino that I'd always loved him. She gave me a suspicious look and asked whether that was truly romantic love, but I definitely think so. At least in my memories, I've always felt that way. I've always hoped that he would reciprocate my feelings. The camera pulls back to show a full-on view of KOKONE's room. The setting is muted. Brown and white objects like her desk, a sound system and plush toys are scattered about. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) My room is saturated with Daiya. When I listen to love songs, his face would come to mind, and when I read a romance manga, I would identify with the feelings of the protagonist to the point of tears at times. I would sometimes write 'Kokone Oomine' in my notebook while studying and smile to myself. I was always thinking about Daiya in this room. DAIYA Kokone. KOKONE Mmm? KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) Just recently, Daiya has started calling me by my first name. I'll never forget the first time it happened. Oh, his tomato-red face has been forever seared into my memory, from that time he failed miserably at suavely saying my first name. DAIYA I love you, Kokone. Forever. KOKONE Mm. I believe you. DAIYA smiles happily like an innocent boy. KOKONE smiles in response. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) I really do, from the bottom of my heart. Not because I'm blinded by love, but because I can feel that he must be telling the truth. KOKONE traces DAIYA's lips with a finger. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) I would give up anything for his happiness.

3. RIVERSIDE - DUSK KOKONE steps into the river without removing her sneakers. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) My world was warm. Warm like Daiya's body. That gentle world I lived in gleamed lightly, just like a French movie I had once seen, and made me feel as though I was surrounded by the purest bliss. Step by step, KOKONE walks further into the crimson river. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) But I was mistaken. I didn't realize that other people didn't live in the gentle world that I dwelled in. I didn't know that the world others saw could be cold, stained, or fierce, and that coming into contact with the worlds of such people would also— Some garbage floating down the river touches KOKONE's soaked body. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) Stain my own world. DAIYA quickly follows her into the river. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) Daiya...Don't tie yourself down with your promise to love me forever. Your happiness is more important to me than my own. I'll do anything for you, so— She gets embraced by an equally soaked DAIYA. DAIYA Kokone, don't worry. I'll stay with you. KOKONE trembles in his wet embrace. KOKONE You're cold. DAIYA hurriedly lets go of her. KOKONE (MONOLOGUE) Should I keep you from becoming happy, I'll make it easier for you to throw me away, okay?

◇◇◇ Kazuki Hoshino - 09/11 FRI 22:15 ◇◇◇

We should avoid Daiya's [servants].

While we still didn't know what to do next, we left the underpass to avoid coming across any [servants]. It would be a bad idea to stay there any longer.

We had no choice but to leave Iroha-san behind. Of course we didn't want to, but the artificial blood would have made us look way too suspicious if we carried her home; plus, we would lose precious time. I regretted it, but she'd have to hang on for two hours until we could put an end to this battle.

Haruaki suddenly and uneasily says, "......Um, Hoshii, I'm not sure if I should tell you, but..."

"Mm? What's the matter?"

"You've got one hell of a scary look right now! I bet you've gotten really cross with Daiyan, haven't you? Leaving that senior girl behind makes perfect sense, too, but you were totally cold when you did it..."

"Huh?"

Was I?

I didn't notice myself...but I guess it's true. Something's definitely not right with me at the moment, considering that I just silently called Daiya a blind bastard.

"I guess it's natural to lose it when he stole Maria-chan from you, but if you don't calm down, you might lose ground, no?"

"Yeah."

Calm down, Kazuki. Calm down and come up with a way to get Maria back.

"And to be honest, I still want to help Daiyan...although I know it won't be easy."

Truthfully, helping Daiya had completely slipped my mind. I was ignoring everything except for Maria.

"...Yeah."

Of course I also want to save Daiya if possible, but if I think about Maria right now, I can't help but get angry at him. I can't keep myself from thinking that such cheap pity would only get in my way.

On the other hand, if I avoid thinking about Daiya, I might end up defeated. But yes...I'd better think about something else now, about something that lets me forget about my anger. And that's— "......Kokone."

Right.

In that case, the first thing that comes to mind is Kokone Kirino.

✵

Two days ago on the evening of September 9th, Kokone called me into her room.

It was the first time I'd seen it. The room was steeped in dark colors and seemed superficially stylish. However, it also made a strange impression on me. In a way, the room seemed to lack coherence and its style seemed fake; a room like that really didn't suit Kokone. I could sense some sort of artificial obligation on her part that drove her to live in such a room.

Well, I couldn't help thinking that way, knowing what I did about Kokone.

That room represents her transformation.

And it stands for—forgetting Daiya.

"...You don't need to hide it anymore. Tell me what happened to Daiya."

Kokone has decided to abandon her denial of Daiya and engage with him instead.

The first thing I thought upon hearing that was:

Thank God.

I had planned to tell her about Daiya either way. No... I had no other choice. Disregarding Kokone or keeping her in the dark in a fight against Daiya would be impossible.

Thus, I was grateful that she had made up her mind and prepared herself of her own accord. After all, the things I had to tell her were sorrowful topics that I would have rather kept silent about.

—The mistake that Daiya committed in the past.

—The pain that Daiya is suffering in the present.

—The tragic end that awaits Daiya in the future.

That knowledge would surely cause her to blame herself.

That knowledge would surely sadden her.

That knowledge would surely keep tormenting her.

But I told her nonetheless.

I told her everything about Daiya.

Kokone lost her voice that day.

When I finished my explanation, she just kept gazing at the wall behind me in a completely dumbfounded manner.

Since all she would do was breathe rhythmically without displaying any other reaction, I left for the time being.

The following day, she told to come to her bedroom once more. When we greeted each other, I noticed that her eyelids were swollen, but apart from that she looked like she always did.

But once I had closed the bedroom door, she immediately started undoing her shirt buttons.

It was all so sudden that I couldn't react properly. I should have looked away, but I just stood there, flabbergasted.

With a deadpan look throughout, she finished removing everything from her upper body except for her bra. She then turned around and showed me her back.

"Look!"

I almost asked what I was supposed to look at.

But I noticed on my own.

First, I noticed the "mark" below the hook of her bra.

It was a burn scar, most likely inflicted with a cigarette pushed against her skin. And not just once; there were so many grim and violent burn marks all over her back, it looked as if someone had dumped a giant heap of trash on a pure white snowfield.

And all those burn marks formed meaningful phrases; the obscene kind that you'd be hard pressed to find in even the filthiest of public toilets.

"———"

Squashed.

My feelings were squashed.

Those marks had an immense impact.

"Uh..uh..."

Tears began to stream, unbidden, down my cheeks.

Thoughts like "poor Kokone, it must have hurt, they won't ever completely disappear, that must be why they broke up" only came up later. At that moment, my only possible response to the sight of those marks was to burst into tears.

Kokone turned around to face me. Ignoring my overflowing tears, she cheerfully said:

"You're a lucky guy, Kazu-kun, aren't you? Getting to see a hot girl with E-cups in her undies!"

While she joked like always, Kokone was...crying.

So our talk continued as we both sobbed.

"A childhood friend of mine named Rino did that to me," Kokone said as she rebuttoned her shirt. "As you know, Daiya had great looks and superb grades; he was very popular back in the day—to the point where some people called him the prince of our school, in fact. He wasn't always so gruff and didn't used to have silver-dyed hair and piercings. Oh, I was such a poor match for him. I looked really drab, with my totally unstyled black hair and lame, oversized glasses. Pretty much a plain old run-of-the-mill girl. You'd totally laugh if I showed you a picture! ...Although I can't laugh myself."

I shook my head.

"It doesn't matter if you're a good match or a bad match! I'm sure Daiya didn't care."

"Mm, he didn't mind at all!" Kokone finished buttoning up her shirt and looked at me. "It's the girls who had fallen for Daiya who cared."

I started to realize how those marks might have come about.

"...Did that girl you mentioned, um, Rino, care about whether you were right for him?"

"Mmmm, not all that much, I think?"

"So...?"

"Err, let me tell you one thing at a time. First off, a couple of things about Rino: She's one year younger than me and was also one of Daiya's childhood friends. The thing is, she'd also liked Daiya for a long time, although I fell in love with him first. But she gave up on him and started dating a boy named Kamiuchi. The person...Daiya killed."

That was a surprise. I hadn't known about their backstory. Daiya's reactions to Koudai Kamiuchi within the 'Game of Idleness' seemed relatively mild, all things considered.

But given the final outcome, it's easy to suspect that their common history might have driven Daiya to choose a murderous resolution to that game.

"Kamiuchi did a horrible thing to Rino, and I don't really get why he did it. Rino was still deeply hurt, so she tried to ease her wounds by demanding Daiya's attention.

But you know, Daiya and I were already a couple by then. He loved me, not her. He was gentle with her, but they'd never be more than friends. When Rino realized that, her wounds got even worse. She kind of went psycho after that. She somehow got mad at me because in her mind, I'd snatched him away from her."

Kokone was still crying, and paused to blow her nose.

But the flow of tears didn't stop.

"Rino claimed that she only started dating Kamiuchi because I'd stolen Daiya from her, so I was responsible for what Kamiuchi did to her. At that point, Rino really believed that I was to blame for everything."

"And that's why she did that to your back...?"

"Yeah, but I don't think she would have gone that far if she had been alone."

"Which means that there were..."

"Right, there were several people involved. You see...I think the problem was that there were lots of people around Rino who could share in her hate and escalate it even further. It was unfortunate that no one realized that Rino was out of her mind, so things escalated from there."

I finally understood what she had meant earlier.

"The girls who thought that you didn't suit Daiya?"

"Yeah. They didn't just have a problem with it...they seemed to think that I had committed an unforgivable sin. I was some kind of wicked witch who was keeping their prince all to myself!"

...What the hell?

I don't get it. An unforgivable sin?

Kokone and Daiya were a couple in love. That's all.

"What the... but that's stupid, no matter how you look at it. You didn't do anything wrong."

"It doesn't matter whether I was wrong or not. A bunch of people were annoyed by me, so they wanted to do something about it. That's all. It doesn't matter if they were just jealous. It's much easier to attack someone you don't like if you tell yourself she's evil."

"How could they think you were evil when you hadn't done anything wrong?"

"That's simple; they just created some trumped up reasons. You know, things like 'ew, that girl doesn't greet us properly' or 'she's arrogant' or 'she's acting like a bitch' or 'she wants to use Daiya to show off' or 'she seduced him with her body'. They come up with whatever they feel like. And then when they had their group trash-talkathons, they could egg each other on and make me out to be a figure of evil. People instinctively do stuff like that without really thinking about it. They create a fake enemy and then take the offensive to vent their annoyance."

Suddenly, the two classmates who had spoken out against Kokone came to mind.

As far as I could tell, they were also badmouthing Kokone out of jealousy. They got ticked off because she's popular with the boys and vilified her to relieve their irritation. It might have also pissed them off that Kokone was on good terms with Daiya.

Considering her history, no wonder Kokone freaked out.

"You know, Rino only went so far overboard because she was encouraged by the people around her. They weren't even aware of how evil their acts were. They thought it was right to teach a devil like me a lesson. Who knows, maybe they even thought they were performing an act of justice? One thing is clear: They didn't realize what they were doing. And that's what made them lose touch with reality."

"What the...that's obviously just ridiculous if you possess even the slightest bit of objectivity..."

"But they couldn't see that. They had stopped thinking."

"...Stopped thinking?"

"Yeah. It's the thing that Daiya often rails about."

Aah.

It's the thing that Daiya detests.

He thinks that it's the mindless fools who destroyed their happiness, and because of that, he wants to create a world without them using a 'box'. So that what happened to Kokone won't ever occur again.

"I think it was about a month later that they finally came to their senses. A few of them even apologized to me after realizing what they had done. But what's the point? Why would I forgive them? My burns won't go away thanks to an apology, will they? There would have only been a point if they came to their senses before doing that to me! How dare they try to relieve their guilt by apologizing? ...When I said something along these lines to them, they actually complained that I was horrible for treating them like that when they were apologizing. Well, fuck'em, those filthy whores!"

Of course, Kokone was still crying while spitting out such vulgarities.

"I can't return to who I was, no matter how much they apologize. I can't return to the time when I didn't hate anyone."

She continues.

"My relationship with Daiya won't return, either."

But there was one thing I didn't get.

"Why?"

"Mm?"

"Why did you need to split up? He still loved you even with those silly marks on your back, didn't he? I mean, didn't he care for you? Why did you have to split up?"

Kokone grew silent.

She gazed at the ceiling as she sniveled. I gathered that she was trying to organize her thoughts.

Only then did I realize that my question might have been cruel. Was there really a point in asking her that? After all, their unwilling split-up is already set in stone. Explaining why it happened is bound to be painful.

While I was regretting my question, Kokone finally opened her mouth.

"Kazu-kun. Do you think I'm cute?"

"Huh?"

I thought that she was just kidding around like she normally did. I thought that she was trying to evade my question.

"Am I cute? Properly cute?"

But her expression was incredibly serious.

I had no idea why she was so desperate, but I could read from her face that I wasn't allowed to answer flippantly.

"...You are cute!"

"Really?"

"Yeah. I'm not engaging in flattery, I really do think so. And I'm not the only one; you're popular with the boys from our school, aren't you? Didn't you tell me the other day that the number of confessions you've gotten was in the two-digit range?"

"You're right. I'm totally popular. At the moment, my value is higher than that of that blatantly rowdy and delinquent Daiya, right! Hell, I'm a luscious high school girl! With an E-cup at that! I'm invincible!" However, the grin she had frantically assumed while engaging in self-praise disappeared instantly, and her lips started to tremble. "......But it's no use."

"N-No use...?"

"I can't get rid of the impression that I'm just a fugly bitch. I can't help feeling like a worthless pig."

"W-Why? I can assure you, that's just—"

"I know! I'm sure I'm pretty cute! I know! I worked hard to become like this, after all! I went to such lengths because I thought it would get better if I really became popular!" Kokone grabbed roughly at my arms. "But it was no use...! Those feelings don't go away even though I realize that it's just in my head! I can't help but feel ugly! The impression that Daiya and I don't match and that I'm a worthless person won't disappear! Objective facts and popular esteem have no effect!"

"B-But why?"

"It was inevitable! Do you think that it wouldn't have any effect on me when people honestly think that I'm a wicked devil? Even worse, I used to be a shy and silent girl, don't you understand what that means? Do you think I could in all honesty still think positively of myself after being treated like sh*t, burned with cigarettes and told off as a devil, a bitch, a whore? I can't! I couldn't! Can you imagine a whole bunch of people doing horrible things to you? Who are seriously thinking that you're just scum who deserves it? Of course I would start to think so, too! Of course I would think that I deserve it! That was the only way to put up with all that stuff! Those marks have stolen all my self-confidence, self-respect, and everything I hold dear!"

A trauma that can't be healed by the truth.

I don't think that I fully understand it.

But there was one thing that I did understand.

Kokone's iron grip was hurting my arms.

"I thought that my self-hate would drive me into my grave. So, I, so, I—" Kokone wiped her tears away. "I had to overcome it!"

Kokone had no other choice. She would have broken otherwise.

"I had to change, I had to abandon my old self!"

That's why Kokone started wearing contact lenses and dyed her hair; she tried to become fashionable. She tried to take on a cheerful personality and become popular—and succeeded. She tried to regain self-confidence by looking down on the people who spoke ill of her.

But at the end of the day, the shadow that had rooted itself in her heart didn't disappear. She couldn't regain the things the marks had stolen from her.

And—

"I also had to abandon my love for Daiya!"

Her past and Daiya were so closely linked, that there was no way around abandoning Daiya—her past—as well.

Kokone finally noticed how tightly she was gripping my arms and released me.

"...I'm sorry, Kazu-kun."

I shook my head.

I'm to blame for making her say such things.

She took a deep breath to calm herself down.

"I didn't want to split up with Daiya, either, but there was no other choice. It's unbearable even if he just hugs me, seriously; my entire past leaps at me when he does, intimidating me like a giant menacing truck. My back fires up and starts to ache like when they burned me, and then I feel I'm a worthless person. I can't help it. So... being with him is agonizing."

They simply couldn't be together anymore.

That's the reason their relationship ended.

—That's terrible.

That's the only comment I could make.

Suddenly, Kokone said to me, "Hey, Kazu-kun, you once confessed to me, didn't you?"

"Uh-eh?"

Why is she bringing up that ancient history? I looked her in the face, but I couldn't read her intentions from her smile.

I never confessed to her. Well, I technically did, but it was really the act of a girl who took control over my body.

But as far as Kokone knows, I actually confessed to her.

"I was thrown for a loop! Unlike all the other confessions I've received, I was happy about yours. I thought that becoming your girlfriend might be the right choice. You wouldn't care about the burns on my back, after all, and you'd accept me as I am."

"...Um, Kokone—" I said, but she continued before I could explain anything.

"I thought that Daiya might finally be able to move on, too."

I held my breath. Not quite sure what to say, I just waited for her to continue.

For whatever reason, Kokone put on a mischievous smile when she saw my confusion.

"I totally didn't expect that Mari-mari had a hand in your confession, though!"

...come to think of it, we never corrected the excuse that we came up with to explain that situation.

"I-I'm sorry...Um, to tell you the truth, it was actually because of someone else's 'box'. The explanation Maria gave you was just a convenient white lie..."

"...Aaah...I see, a 'box', was it! Now it finally adds up. Man, those 'boxes' sure cause a lot of trouble, don't they? ...But I guess in retrospect, I'm grateful? I think it was necessary for me to earnestly think about going out with you, Kazu-kun."

"Why...do you think so?"

"Say, do you remember that I burst into tears during our music class?"

"Yeah."

That was the incident when I was getting a beating from Daiya after I regained control of my body. Afterwards I learned that the 'owner' had not only made me confess to Kokone, but even urged her to respond.

"You know, Daiya and I, we thought that it would be best for us if we started seeing other people. We really intended to do so when we found a worthy opportunity. And that opportunity arose when you confessed to me. I imagined myself going out with you and Daiya dating a different girl. But when I looked at Daiya while thinking those thoughts—"

She smiled bitterly.

"I burst into tears."

She quickly lost even that bitter smile.

"And then I finally realized."

She contorted her face in a painfully bitter and sorrowful manner and said:

"I was still deeply in love with Daiya."

I was sure she wanted to deny her feelings. Over and over. That's what her bitter expression conveyed to me.

"In reality, I wanted him to be there only for me."

For if she admitted it, she would no longer be able to wish for Daiya to become happy with someone else.

"I realized that my feelings for him wouldn't go away even if I went out with you, Kazu-kun. And I kinda also realized that it was the same for Daiya. Our problem won't be resolved until I return to who I used to be. As long as I can't accept him like I used to. Even if it's a hopeless cause, that's the only way."

A tragedy.

"Daiya couldn't bear it any longer, could he?"

The world around them changed, but they couldn't. They couldn't accept reality.

"So he obtained a 'box'. But doesn't that—" unable to bear it any longer, Kokone pressed her forehead against my shoulder. "Doesn't that mean it's my fault that Daiya's life has gone off the rails?!"

I couldn't see her face.

"I'll do anything. I'll do anything if I can save him. If we need a 'box', I'll do it! Take my life and do whatever you want!"

I unwittingly repeated those alarming words, "...your life?"

"Yeah. I'm serious."

She was. For sure.

She was willing to sacrifice herself for Daiya.

And as a matter of fact, Daiya has already sacrificed himself.

Had it not been Daiya but Kokone who resorted to a 'box' first, it would have led to a different yet similar tragedy.

Their feelings for each other are destroying each other.

That's their ugly yet beautiful romance.

Aah. Let's pretend that incident with Kokone's back never happened.

There would have been no problem with their romance; it would have stayed enviably perfect. No ugliness would have existed. They would have been happy with each other.

One single misfortune disturbed the equilibrium.

All it would have taken was one fewer mistake. What if Rino hadn't been Daiya's childhood friend? What if Rino hadn't gone out with Koudai Kamiuchi? What if he hadn't done that horrible thing to Rino? What if Kokone and Daiya had hidden their relationship? What if Kokone had had a slightly bolder personality? What if there had been someone who stepped in to stop the bullying? What if Daiya had noticed Rino's absurd plan? What if Haruaki had been more open about his affection for Kokone? What if I had known them since middle school? Just a tiny difference could have changed fate, and we might have been laughing together right now about the past.

Even as such thoughts come to me for the first time, I realize that Kokone and Daiya must have thought about those what ifs a thousand times, and they must have hated this world for ruining them. But for the smallest "what if…"

That is the true reason Daiya is fighting his losing battle of correcting a world he doesn't even care about.

...What about Kokone, then?

"Kokone."

"Mm?" she muttered as she pressed her forehead against my shoulder again.

"What would you use a 'box' for?"

"I would use it for Daiya! I would wish for a world where we can be happy!"

But there is no such future.

Daiya has reached a point of no return.

That 'wish' won't come true, and Kokone must be aware of that.

"But I'm a bit uneasy: Could I use it without putting any strange stray thoughts into it?"

And that's why she said that.

She finally raised her head, wearing a weak smile, and said something to me that was enough to convince me that she could never return to who she used to be.

"Could I fulfill that 'wish' without also wishing for everyone but Daiya to go to hell?"

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