Published at 11th of April 2026 7:02 am

Chapter 144: A Moist Malaise

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I go back to my dorm, where I bathe for a few hours while growing the plants, wanting some extra coin for the game tomorrow. I start recording results as usual, but then just stop bothering Its funny, I started this project before I even joined the stupid club, but having something to report at it seems to have subsumed my original reason.

Maybe its time to start over with different plant varieties. I already have plenty of records on this set, and it would feel fitting.

In the bubbling, boiling water, waiting for a growth cycle to finish, my mind cant help but turn again and again to Ser Terry. Why would he side against me like that? Call me stupid for believing them when I thought they were speaking precisely about the nature of their little club He didnt actually call me that, did he? He thought it, though, Im certain. He might think he can hide such thoughts from me, but he cant Im too enhanced.

Maybe hes right. I mean, this isnt even the first time that I caused myself embarrassment by thinking that a description was straightforward. The irregular fighting class was the same. I thought it was unreasonable at the time that a class labelled that wouldnt teach you how to fight irregularly, but then again, nobody else made the same mistake. Besides, while two occurrences is hardly enough to draw conclusions, it does start to make it seem like the problem is with me.

But what is the problem exactly then? It cant just be a cultural thing, because neither Ser Terry nor Ligryn are Arkothan, yet they both instantly understood what their respective gatherings were really about. Its conceivable that Caethlian culture uniquely differs in some regard, but I havent seen any evidence to that. Though I suppose I would have to go back home and see if it happened again to be sure.

So, for now, assume the problem is with me personally, but what? Perhaps Ser Terry was right, and Im just stupid I suppose the easy answer is to just blame it on my relationship with Anar, though I would have thought that would lead me to be less trusting that people mean precisely what they say rather than more.

Maybe its the hunger that whats his name? Lindrids assistant. Anyways, maybe its the hunger that he spoke of making me more direct. Or maybe I was always like this, and Anar has nothing to do with it. Its impossible to know, as Im so tied up with my experience with him. What would myself who didnt go to Anar even mean? It cant be separated, so its pointless to think about the origins of the trait. Rather, I need to focus on the trait itself, except I dont know what it is.

Now that I think about it, if I expand the criteria, this wasnt even just the second time this happened. That time I threw sand at Bart could also be said to be me not understanding something that everyone thought was obvious. Its just the opposite situation in some ways, since rather than believing something clearly stated meant what it said, it was something vaguely stated that everyone assumed excluded a specific action that I did not understand.

In fact, expanded that way, the exam was full of similar situations. Like when Erik treated my stopping shooting three fifths of the way through that test as so abhorrent as to allow himself to be distracted by it; like my trick in the occulter tournament that allegedly caused chaos and made Denton hostile to me; like my reporting of Prestons acquaintance and subsequent tricking in the pursuit game (alongside with everyone else in it); like my allowing our mundanes to die in the fight against the veteran knight; and, of course, like the chaos I sowed in the final test that got a new rule added between rounds.

Each and every time I thought I was being clever, at least mildly, but I wasnt I was just failing to see what everyone else thought was obvious. Maybe coming up with novel solutions is a necessary condition for cleverness, but its not sufficient. It also has to induce praise by those who witness it, rather than scorn.

Why am I being so harsh against myself? True cleverness, false cleverness, what does it matter? It got me into the academy and allowed me to continue my mission. Besides, false cleverness is probably better in the field anyways it takes less time to produce.

Im not in the field, though, am I?

I feel a sort of itching, though different in some inexplicable way to the one I feel when fixating on Anar sacrifice. Its more of a general restlessness. A desire to move back to a sort of activity that Im familiar with, rather than reposing in this luxury.

Unfortunately, the act of drying off and dressing does not engage my mind enough to thwart further thought on the matter. My mind churns over the questions I asked myself and left unanswered: What is wrong with me? Why am I being harsh against myself?

I dont find the answer to the first one, but the second one suddenly strikes me. Im being self-harsh because I dont want to be harsh against Ser Terry. My thoughts are circling because of that little exchange, the row, I suppose, because Im trying to find ways in which it isnt Ser Terrys fault. Which is, of course, absurd, as it absolutely was. Why would he continue arguing for their side of things, even going so far as to use an argument that, while possibly valid, he certainly knew was unsound?

I mean, if he still doesnt want to include me in his little adventures, thats one thing, but to lie to me about things only tangentially related to it?

Or, no, I suppose he didnt actually lie, as he spoke in a hypothetical to demonstrate the faultiness of my reasoning regarding Ligryn. But it was certainly deliberately misleading to dispute my conclusion when he knew that, while it may not have been valid, it certainly was true.

Unfortunately, while this revelation is much needed, it is ill timed. Im going to a low section to hunt a rival killer while avoiding those looking for us both. I cant afford to let my emotions distract me. To let my completely correct anger at Ser Terry get me caught or killed.

Fortunately, the rhythmic walking to my destinations relaxes me somewhat, surprisingly more than my bath at least. I feel like Im moving towards danger, and that helps focus my mind.

However, before going to the section, I head to my house for the vespertine training section with Jules. The house being only about a ten minute deviation from most of my routes home, I have been dropping by for lessons most nights. She, as expected, has been making remarkable progress, having already learned a basic spell. Im thinking of moving her up to a personal shield spell. It might be too soon, but I want to make sure shes capable of keeping herself safe as soon as possible. Perhaps I should purchase her some enchanted clothes in the meantime. Nothing on the level of my own, just something that can turn a mundane blade.

Though perhaps that would be excessive. After all, its not like shes likely to get into trouble so close to the school, and she knows how to handle herself if she does. Then again, is there a reason to chance an event? I have the spare coin for it, at least for the moment, and its better to use it now than lose it when I eventually run into bad luck in my new gambling hobby. I guess Ill have Greg find her something basic when I meet him next. Well, basic including cleaning, repairing and resizing functions, of course. It would be silly to have to replace it in a few years, after all.

Klar arrives while Im training Jule (and the other two who managed to advance quickly enough to be worth bringing here, but not quickly enough to remember their names), and she reports their efforts to find the cultist as we go back to their lair.

Much of what she says I already know, though I dont interrupt since its better to hear repeated information than for her to skip something vital because she thinks I know it. Despite it aving not been feasible for me to go back to the section over the week, I wasnt entirely idle. There are, of course, the daily reports via the remote sense token I left with them, as well as Klar going to the house to convey information from me to them.

I also havent been wholly absent from the section, either, as Ive been using my birds wearing the combined animal talk/remote sense tokens to remotely patrol where the murders and disappearances have been.

I havent found what I want that way, but its not wholly unpromising. Ive seen at least a few dozen violent acts, including two murders, but unfortunately, they all seemed to be personally motivated, and I certainly didnt run across anyone in the act of applying runes.

Still, it wasnt a complete waste of time. For one, Ive been getting a better sense of the section. Unfortunately, I still havent figured out the sort of person who would have the sort of social connections to fit my theory. They cant just know people casually, but must be intimate enough that they would notice the change.

That said, there are people who keep showing up. In particular are individuals who travel from area to area to sell their services or trinkets. Which is something Ive associated more with rural areas, going from town to town in a loop. I had always assumed itd be more economical in such densely populated areas to just have a fixed shop where people go to you. But it seems that there are services that are needed, but so infrequently as to make that economically unviable. Traveling vendors and tinkerers going about on a loop that meanders through the section over the course of weeks.

There are also a few travelling clerics offering to facilitate contracts for various minor deities, but I discount them completely, as an Anar cultist trying that disguise would just get them smote.

Despite the vendors and tinkerers not fitting my theory, I do allocate some birds to follow them around, as even if my exact theory is wrong, there still needs to be an explanation for the dispersed pattern of possible victims. They could just go into areas at random, but that doesnt fit with them knowing that the confirmed victim lived alone. Taking time to scout out victims without a reason for being there draws suspicion, which the people who live here are already naturally prone to with good reason.

However, I again find nothing strange with any of them, and its beginning to become logistically unfeasible to track them all. While I do have the mud hares act as a feed hub to entice my winged spies (a very minor expense paid from my weekly take), and while they do tend to be perfectly willing to follow people around for hours at a time once theyre confident that food will be coming, they do get tired and need to be swapped out. Which, being as they cant communicate with each other to a degree remotely adequate to the task, means that I have to keep track of the status of each of the dozens of birds Ive employed and direct the switches myself. A task that seems to grow in complexity faster than linearly with each avian agent added.

Jack, however, has pulled through for me, at least a little.

Two things. First, our contact with the guards told us theres been another body.

Near the others? I ask.

Not near the body, but near one of the missing people. Its a few territories away. He points to the crude map I left before.

I stare at where he points, muttering to myself. Theres clearly a pattern here; its just the nature of it thats obscure. At the very least, I dont think the placement of the killings is meant to be part of some grand ritual or anything magic related, even if I remove people from the list of presumed dead at random. Ive also tried looking near the centre of the scattered arrangement, looking for public places where people from multiple territories might gather, but failed to find much.

Theres a market and a brothel, both of which could be a good place to find victims, but I havent found anything. Especially the brothel which is harder to get birds inside of. Besides, a killer prostitute would just be too obvious. It would have been the first thing Vithal would have checked. Besides, I asked Allan about it during our lunch (which he seemed strangely embarrassed about answering), and there are a number of safeguards put in place that would make that impractical.

Mainly, while the brothel will operate with some discretion, they do keep a vague track of which customers go to each employee or vice versa in the case of home calls. Since there have been any number of cases (apparently, for some reason) where a customer will become obsessed with a provider and commit violent acts against them. But that also means that it would be obvious if the customers of a single prostitute tended to vanish.

Which is unfortunate, as a prostitute would have fit my theory nicely.

Anyways, this new body seems like a major clue. Its the first victim in close proximity to another, so its definitely something Ill look into. Unfortunately, the best course of action would be to search individual houses, but thats simply something I dont have the resources to do. At least not faster than the guards, who are almost certainly forcing themselves into doors as we speak.

Good work. Whats the second thing? I ask, not looking away from the map, mentally drawing lines between points as if there might be some geometry which will suddenly reveal the killer, but which I simply havent been smart enough to see yet.

The mage said she found a thread, but wants more coin to pull at it.

I glance up at him, trying to assess whether he thinks she thinks that its a significant lead. How much?

He shrugs. A large gold, plus she wants in on the deal we have with your merchant.

I hesitate briefly, then nod. I still have plenty of coin from the game with Monroe, and even an unlikely lead may be worth it. Agreed. Ill come by again tomorrow and bring it. But tell her this isnt just for this lead, but for any other lead she finds. If she pulls out, then she loses access to the deal. But if she finds the killer, Ill give her an additional large.

Jack hesitates. Youre putting a lot of your own coin into this, boss.

I shrug. I did say I have personal reasons for finding the killer.

You mind telling us what those are? he asks.

Yes, I do, I say without hesitation. Is that going to be a problem?

We stare at each other silently, challengingly, before he finally looks away. No, boss. Im just worried about what else you might be willing to put into this.

Dont worry. I wont do anything to put the Mud Hares at risk. Its why I hired an outside agent to do all the direct inquiries.

Yeah, I believe that. But what about putting yourself at risk? Weve only been able to regain our lost territory because people have figured out we got a patron. We wont last long if they figure youve been killed going after some grudge.

I dont smile at his assumption about why Im doing this. If hes invented some story about me losing family or something to a cultist, so much the better. Ill be fine. You know how capable I am.

He nods. Yeah, but I dont know the same about the cultist.

Theres no answer to that, so I just silently nod.

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